Livingston Lawyer Pens Advice Book On Caring For Elderly Relatives

Taking care of elderly relatives and parents can be a difficult and trying experience. Livingston elder law attorney Yale Hauptman has specialized in that field for more than 20 years and now the new author is sharing his knowledge with other adults. 

Hauptman has written a self-published book, "Be Nice to Me - I Pick Your Nursing Home!" 

The book helps readers navigate through the tricky world of Medicaid, long-term care planning and estate planning. He sprinkles the text with anecdotes about what some families have experienced, such as how to protect a family business when preparing for long-term care, how to apply for veterans benefits and how to avoid problems when taking care of a loved one with Alzheimer's disease or dementia. 

Hauptman has been blogging about elder care for 4½ years and his book expands upon the stories he's heard over the years. He also said he wrote the book to help adults who are struggling to take care of their elderly parents.

Hauptman will hold a book talk 2 p.m. Sunday at CareOne at Livingston Assisted Living, 76 Passaic Ave. For more information, call (973) 758-4100. 

The top three things Hauptman said people should know about caring for the elderly include:

1. You've got to plan ahead, and the earlier you can do that, the better. It's not the best time to be responding in crisis mode. 

2. The long-term care system is a maze of laws and benefits. The cost of care could approach or exceed $125,000 a year for some nursing homes. Most middle-class Americans cannot afford to pay for that level of care indefinitely, and there are some government programs that pay for care, but it's not easy to qualify for it and an application for one program could work for a while but (could be a problem) with no plans for the next step of the elder care journey. 

3. Don't try to do it yourself. If you try to navigate the system yourself, you're likely to encounter a mistake that can cost you thousands of dollars or a lot of stress. There is help available. You just have to look for it. 

Carol Katz, co-owner of Adult Care Advisers, an elder-care advisory company based in Livingston and Marlboro, said she has been following Hauptman's blog for about six months and she enjoys his writing style and it provides information on how an attorney can help protect a family's assets, liabilities and future needs. 

"He gives real-life situations, so it's not a textbook scenario," Katz said. "It's a real life scenario a family is going through. ... It's like a college education all at once. It helps me do my job that more efficiently in helping families."

Leigh Schaeffer, co-owner of the Morristown division of Caring Transitions, a franchise senior moving and relocation service, has been reading Hauptman's blog for a year. 

She called Hauptman's blog informative and engaging and she plans to get his book. 

"Clearly he's a good writer and he conveys a lot of caring and compassion," Schaeffer said. "That's part of what makes it more engaging to read. It's not just another number or business. It's (writing about) an individual case."

"Be Nice To Me - I Pick Your Nursing Home!" is available on Amazon.com.

To learn more about Hauptman, visit hauptmanlaw.com.