How My Autistic Son Got Through The Blackout

Everyone hates a blackout and we’ve been lucky that in our time in North Jersey, we never experienced a blackout other than a flicker on and off for 13 years. So, all of us were kind of shocked when Hurricane Sandy knocked out our power. 

My husband was prepared and we all got gas and listened to the advice. Still, I wasn’t that nervous because even during Hurricane Irene last year – we never got flooding or lost power. 

Well, it was hard enough on typical 6- year-old. She was scared, but we explained to her what was happening, cuddled with her, gave her a flashlight and stayed with her till she felt safe. 

My son, who is 10 and severely autistic, fell right to sleep because he had all his medications in him and it was time to go to sleep anyway. However, when he woke up at his usual 6 a.m. – he was all confused. His whole world had turned upside down and he had no idea why.  I couldn’t give him a shower, as I was afraid that the water was cold. I tried to sign this to him. However, let me explain that autistic children feel safe by their routine.  When their routine is thrown off, they get very upset because it is their safety net and their sense of control in a world
where they have very little control.  

Anyway, he was upset about the shower but I asked him if I could just change him instead and luckily he was content with that. Then, his next procedure in the morning is to either watch TV or go into the sunroom. Well, obviously the TV wasn’t working and we couldn’t open the sunroom for fear the only heat we had would escape. The poor kid kept roaming the house back and forth.  I told him “all done” for TV – for he would not understand not working. I might have even signed “broken," however he kept going up to it and tried to turn it on. He handed me the remote several times.  

Then when I kept telling him no –he walked in circles to and from his
room, trying to turn on and off the light. This of course, made no sense to him. 
Why wasn’t the light working? I luckily had a flashlight and tried following him around. 

He asked for the sunroom but again, I had to tell him “no”.  He wasn’t too bad with that, surprisingly enough – he just had no idea what to do with himself. He has no play skills as it is and the TV and DVD player is his lifeline. So, for at least a half hour he kept going around in circles from his room to the living room.  Realizing that nothing was changing, I was finally able to give him his medication and he calmed down but he started weeping softly. 

My little 5-year-old gets upset when she sees him crying so she repeated to him what I told her in the evening, “It’s OK, Michael, it’s just a power outage. It’s a blackout and we don’t have any power but it’s OK because we’re all safe and we’re all together.”  She’s so sweet and mothering towards him; it's amazing to witness how much love she has for him. However, her explanation didn’t really help.  I tried to tell her, “He has no idea what a blackout is.” I even said, “Neither do you for that matter.”  But to my surprise, she did understand the entire concept. 

Anyway, by then my husband was up and we were all together. Michael was still crying on and off but eventually he was happy that we all home and he didn’t have school and he just kept coming over to me and my husband for hugs and squeezes and then played quietly alongside his sister by bouncing on his ball a bit and watching her. 

Amazing what love and understanding can do for any child. I could have easily lost it with him, but I didn’t. I tried to imagine what it must be like for
him to have his entire world turned upside down for a day and not understand
why. 

Well, we were the lucky ones. My husband finally couldn’t take trying to
entertain both of them and he missed his TV too –so he took them out to
McDonalds &  Wal-Mart in NY (just down the block from us) – they had power.  I was content that all my housework was done –I had prepared ahead of time and was actually through with laundry and cooking so I fell asleep.  

At 3:15 pm – the phone rang –I had fallen asleep.  My sister-in-law was calling to see if we had power and I realized we did since our phone was working.  I walked around the house turned off the lights, turned on the heat and was very happy. 

They came back pretty happy too.  The power was back on and they had McDonalds and some new cheap toys and had off from school. For them, life doesn’t get any better than that.  As for my husband and I, we knew that not only were we lucky to have each other but we were lucky that a huge tree that fell (an Evergreen) and broke our fence, did not fall on the house and did not hurt anyone and fell right in the middle of our backyard – couldn’t be a better place for it to fall –didn’t even break the swing-set.  We both said “There’s a G-d and he’s looking out for us,” because for us life is not about feeling sorry for ourselves; it’s
about looking at the positives and making the most of what we have. 

Perhaps that is why our children are content and happy; because we are.