Health & Fitness
First day of school. A day of mixed emotions. Please Help!
First day of school. A day of mixed emotions for this mother of three who needs your support.
Every act of conscious learning requires the willingness to suffer an injury to one's self-esteem. That is why young children, before they are aware of their own self-importance, learn so easily. ~Thomas Szasz
Labor day weekend is over. We took a a last mini- escape before the first day of school and visited our good friends in Vermont. And just like that, back to our normal routines of making lunches and repeatedly saying "go, go, go...we are going to be late!" this morning. This day is filled with mixed emotions, as it was last year and every year before that, it seems, since the girls started going to school. I look forward to a quiet house and office for 6 hours a day. I love watching my daughters' excitement as they enter school again. This year, I have one daughter entering middle school and she proudly went off with her friends for the first time. And, now I sit here alone with tears in my eyes.
I think in some ways, the first day of school highlights two opposing needs. On one hand, I want to be "everything" to my children. I want to feel oneness with them. And on the other side I want separation. I want to pursue my thing, when I want to, alone and for me! And I also realize that just as we need to continue to nurture and prepare the kids for school and life, we also need to continue (or start to!) nurture our life beyond our parenting role. What this means for me is welcoming both needs rather than resisting or feeling bad for wanting one or the other. It means not only focusing on my children but also asking myself: "am I OK?, "what feeds me?, "what stops me from being/feeling the best I can" or "what are my needs?".
And so in this moment, I am choosing to sit with the discomfort of this pull I feel to both feel oneness with my children and separation. And I am reaching out to all of you inspiring moms, dads, grandmothers, grandfathers and beyond to reach out and share with me. Share a win, share a thought, share a discomfort, share a feeling, share thanks, share a fear. By sharing, you will not only take a moment to support yourself but also give another mom and human being the comfort of knowing she is not alone. I know I need it today.
