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Health & Fitness

Newt? Really?

A liberal tries to make sense of the latest Republican front-runner

Nick Muson, Neighbor
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"Gingrich — primary mission, Advocate of civilization, definer of civilization, Teacher of the rules of civilization, arouser of those who fan civilization, … leader (possibly) of the civilizing forces.”
    

Newt Gringrich. Newt. Gingrich. It’s hard to get one’s brain around this new development. The inmates have truly taken over the asylum in the Republican Party. I think most people had the feeling that the various presumptive front runners wouldn't make it to the finish line (Bachmann, Perry, Cain), but Newt is different. For one thing, the Iowa caucuses are less than a month away, but more importantly, what could possibly come out about Newt that would further injure his already mangled reputation?

I won’t get into the specifics of Newt’s various and sundry faults – that’s all very well-documented and agreed-upon across the political spectrum. But how on Earth could such a unlikable hypocritical blowhard get the support of so many Republicans? The stark reality is that unless President Barack Obama campaigns in a burka and appoints Rev.Wright as his new VP, Newt has a near-zero chance of winning a general election. Nationally, he polls a little better than Casey Anthony and a little worse than fruitcake. But the wingers on the right just doesn’t seem to care. Why not?

I have come across a couple of theories that are helping me make sense of this mass hysteria:

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  1. The Republican base doesn’t understand what it means when their favorite candidates are referred to as non-presidential or not up to the job. They think that Newt is impervious to that claim.

  • Newt’s angry and loud and mean. Romney's just too soft. The base doesn’t believe Romney will destroy liberalism — they’re afraid he’s too reasonable. No one would ever accuse Newt of being reasonable.

  • Newt at least sounds like a smart person. He has a Ph.D., which gives him the right to call himself a historian, and he's written a lot of books. That’s good enough for the right; they don’t really care if any of it is intelligible or consistent, and he probably won’t flub any basic history or geography tests. He says things that sound educated and high-falutin’, but the not-so-secret secret is that it’s all dependent on his audience not knowing any better.

  • The Republican base actually believes that Newt would put the hurt on Obama during the presidential debates. He's proven that he's capable of making the other Republican ditto-heads look dumber than they already looked (if that's even possible). They are dying for Obama to be humiliated, and they think Newt's the one to do it.


    • Like most liberals, the possibility of Newt getting the nomination fills me with glee and laughter, at least initially. But it’s frightening that, in our two-party system, we have one party that's been taken over by radicals who are almost exclusively motivated by and defined by their hatred for liberalism and all things liberal. It’s a war mentality, and they don’t want a statesman, they want a Caesar. Newt’s their man, and it’s scary.

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