From Proposal to Wedding Day - Choosing a Venue

Choosing the place where you and your partner will have your wedding reception is probably the most important decision in your wedding planning process. After all, your memories, photos and videos will be all visually based in that place. 

I always suggest to start your venue shopping process with lots of talking - which also is a great practice for when you are married (wink-wink). 

Go on a date with your partner, have a drink and talk openly about your preferences, your likes and dislikes and what would make you feel the happiest  and most relaxed on your wedding day. You will not always be on the same page, but if you can at least narrow it down to what type of a wedding you agree on (outdoorsy vs ballroom setting) you will be on your way. And for those of you that simply cannot agree on the same location, I suggest a compromise.

A couple I recently worked with was torn between a ballroom wedding with an outdoorsy element (the bride-to-be) and a country club wedding (golf-playing groom-to-be). My solution was the Park Savoy in Florham Park, a private mansion with a garden overlooking - drum roll please - a golf course. A perfect compromise! 

The venue choice will also dictate many of your other wedding decisions. For instance, if you choose a ballroom setting, it would be hard to picture that with dainty meadow flowers and tree bark signs, and it would probably require elaborate flower arrangements.

Once you have a general idea of what type of location you both would be happy with, it’s time to figure out the monetary aspect of it. To find out what you can afford to spend per person - which is how the venue will charge you - take your total budget amount and calculate 48 percent of it. That’s your venue budget. Divide that number by the number of guests. That’s your per person allowance. See an example below, based on a $40,000 budget and 150 guests (the most typical numbers in my wedding planning experience).

BUDGET: $40,000

VENUE BUDGET: $19,200

NUMBER OF GUESTS: 150

DOLLAR AMOUNT PER GUEST: $128

This number ($128 per guest) will be your benchmark number when deciding on your venue. 

Do your virtual research first on wedding websites. Sites and Services website lists venues with their actual per guest cost, which will guide you to the venues that are in your price range. New Jersey Bride website lists venues by the type of wedding reception (outdoorsy wedding vs. ballroom wedding). 

Keep in mind that a lot of advertised prices don’t include tax and service charge (typically 20 to 25 percent of your final bill). So if you have $128 per person limit, after tax and service charge, your real per person limit is only $103.

Once you narrow down your venue selection to three to five places, I highly recommend scheduling an appointment and seeing it in person, so it’s just you and the place. Each venue does have bridal shows on regular bases, but these tend to be very crowded and impersonal. 

And when you walk through the door of the venue that takes your breath away... you will know that you’ve arrived! 

Next step would be to schedule a tasting or, if the venue doesn’t allow it, attend one of their bridal shows that serve some of their kitchen’s creations. Bear in mind that a lot of times it’s hard to judge the cuisine by the pint size appetizers being served, but unfortunately sometimes that’s all you can do.

So, you finally got it! Your dream location at your price range with amazing food. 

In the next blog, I will share my thoughts and expertise on the alternatives to the typical wedding venues and how to get a venue that you love, but can not afford. In the meantime - happy wedding planning!