Anxiety Goes Up as the Number of Working People Goes Down

Panic.  That’s the only word I can think of to describe the fleeting feeling I’ve experienced a couple of times recently.  It’s the scary sense that maybe I never will be able to find full-time employment again.  My normally suppressed levels of stress and anxiety seem to be slowly but steadily rising.  I can usually control them, but lately I’m feeling these occasional bursts of panicky feelings breaking through.

I don’t even want to talk about the latest unemployment rate, which went up to 9.1 percent for May.  And breaking news – now they’re reporting that today’s long-term unemployment is worse than it was during the Great Depression!  http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/06/05/eveningnews/main20069136.shtml

Speaking of long-term unemployment, an article I read last week didn’t help calm my nerves.  It says that one unemployed person out of three has been out of work for a year or more.  That’s over four million people, including me, I’m sorry to say.  http://blogs.wsj.com/economics/2011/06/03/nearly-1-in-3-unemployed-out-of-work-more-than-a-year/?KEYWORDS=1+in+3+unemployed+out+of+work+a+year+or+more

I’m at a point where I feel like I have to continually try things that might help me find a job (or that at least, that make me feel like I’m doing things that might help me find a job).  Of course I’m still searching and applying for jobs, but since my efforts have been fruitless so far, I’m going to focus on improving my presentation and methods.  I still refuse to give up and become one of the “discouraged workers” who simply stops trying, although I can definitely understand, at times, wanting to do exactly that.

So I think to myself, maybe if I just tried x, that could make the difference.  My latest idea is to study my way to a new job.  Last week I signed up for a free resume-writing workshop offered to alumni by the career services people at my nearby alma mater.  Tomorrow night I’ll attend an online seminar about “age-friendly employers” (that’s a euphemism for employers who are open to hiring people over 50).  And tonight, I’m attending an informal networking event at a local restaurant.

Sometimes I do feel, when I allow myself to, that this is all for naught, that nothing’s ever going to come of my job-seeking efforts.  I don’t let myself stay in that negative place for too long, though.  I don’t see how feeling that way can help me at all. 

I don’t believe in living in Fantasy Land either.  So I acknowledge my occasional feelings of panic and anxiety and negativity; but at least for now, I’ll keep signing up for the next activity that just might help me.  Hmm, let’s see, there’s a job fair in Edison in three weeks…