Sex, Grapes, Rocky Roads Dominate 'Real Housewives' Latest Outing

After four relatively peaceful vacation days spanning the last three episodes, “The Real Housewives of New Jersey” seemed like it might heat up on Sunday.

Having concluded the RV part of their journey through northern California, the Housewives and their clan head to the posh Lancaster Estates for a few days, so that and can conduct their business with Levendi Wine, a new client of their marketing company.

A big topic of conversation through the last RV ride was the talk and had last week about the state of their estranged friendship. Although they both agreed they were good again, the two seem to have different ideas about the end result of the conversation.

Giudice still complained that Laurita was prying into her life by responding to stories she saw in the media about the Giudices. Sister-in-law tries to explain how issues are no longer “between you and your husband” when they are on the cover of magazines.

“I think where a lot of the hostility lies…is that in these magazines you’re not just talking about you,” Melissa said. “It’s come out that you’ve bashed me, you’ve bashed Kathy, you’ve said a couple of things about Caroline…”

“Tell you the truth, once the magazine’s written I can’t do anything about it,”Giudice said. “It’s like why cry over spilt milk?”

Yet she believed that her relationship with Laurita can return to where it was.

“Now that we went through this, hopefully our relationship will be more stronger,” Giudice said.

Meanwhile, Laurita complained that Giudice still did not “admit” to any wrong doing, and concludes that she just “won’t go too deep” with her former best friend.

“And that’s totally fine and wherever you stand with her is fine because she’s there for your entertainment and that’s it,” Laurita’s niece said. “But the fact of the matter is if there’s someone around me who’s constantly screwing people, who’s constantly doing things that are morally incorrect, why would I want to be associated with that?”

Laurita claimed it’s a different situation because her husband and Joe Giudice are still friends, despite the fact that no genuine friendship between them has ever been shown on the show and Giudice actively bashed Jacqueline to Chris Laurita just a few episodes ago.

Everyone seems much more cheerful when they arrive at the estate, as it is everything an RV is not.

Unfortunately, the Lauritas and Manzos made the decision to take everyone on the tour of Levendi Wine, in spite of knowing how this crowd tends to get around wine. Namely, made ridiculous comments about the wine and complained about wanting to go eat, while made sexual comments the entire time.

“I’m not sure what’s going on,” Teresa said. “It’s supposed to be fun, not work. The Lauritas and the Manzos organized this and now they look agitated.”

Later, during a similar tour of Lancaster Estates, the sexual humor and ridiculous antics got even worse. Surprisingly, it seemed to be Gorga who got on the most people’s nerves.

“Joe Gorga: I love him for his spontaneity and humor, but not when it’s important — not when it means something, not when we’re in someone else’s house. At that moment I was regretting my brother’s decision to have everybody there,” Caroline said.

All this was forgotten when the Manzo family blindfolded Caroline and took her to a hill overlooking a breathtaking vineyard for a special fiftieth birthday party. The Manzo kids each gave an amazing, tear jerking toast, but it is Joe Giudice’s toast that was most shocking, if only for its relative coherence:

“We go back a long time; we’ve always been, you know, clients of your at your restaurant.,what do you call it? The Brownstone! So I mean, we’ve been together for a long time. The bottom line is, we should still continue the friendship. Never mind the bullcrap. And that’s it.”

Everyone toasts to that, but the moment was quickly ruined when Giudice then made an either very suspicious or edited to be very suspicious phone call to “work,” which could easily be interpreted as a code word for mistress. Teresa’s response to this was to drag him into the grape vines and attempt to have sex with him. On camera.

“… Knowing Teresa it made sense, because Caroline was the center of attention and Teresa needed some attention, so why not have sex in the grapes?” Jacqueline said.

“All I kept hearing, was 'Come on, we can do it here,' and all I was thinking is, 'This guy doesn’t even want you in the bedroom, what made you think he’s going to do it on gravel?'” Rich Wakile said.

And still there was no arguing, just a strange transition that seems to take us to the following evening, when everyone was getting ready for dinner. Jacqueline did Teresa’s hair, while Kathy Wakile did Caroline’s. Talk in both conversations turned to how everyone has been getting along on the trip, specifically Teresa and Kathy.

Teresa told Jacqueline about her tiff with Kathy over the recipes in her book earlier in the week, but said she was happy she talked about it with Kathy.

“My priority on this trip is my brother and Melissa, but if Kathy stops making malicious comments, of course we can have a relationship,” she said.

Meanwhile, Caroline told Wakile: “I see [Teresa’s] movement towards Melissa, but I don’t see movement towards you.”

Wakile agreed.

“I’ve grown to really care about Kathy, and I feel bad for her because it appears she’s been pushed out by Teresa,” Manzo said. "But I think she’s compassionate enough to step aside and let the Gorgas do what they need to … she’s willing to take the hit — it shows character.”

Laurita joined them and suggested Wakile sit next to Giudice at dinner. She did, and almost magically, Giudice decides to give a toast which reinforced the earlier conversation.

“Chris and Jacqueline, thank you for inviting us, we had a lot of fun. Joe and I loved spending time with my brother and Melissa, and we love you guys very much. Oh and happy birthday to Caroline!”

There was an awkward moment when Caroline refused to raise her glass because of the “mean toast,” and everyone but Teresa began to discuss it in whispers.

“You forgot to include me in the toast! I guess I wasn’t worthy?” Wakile said. “Pick and choose when we’re family, when we’re not? Quite honestly, I felt embarrassed.”

Her husband felt differently.

“…Coming from Teresa, I don’t care,” he said. “I’m just upset that my wife is making all this effort to make things better and Teresa, she gets nastier and nastier.”

Whether it was intentional or not, Giudice’s exclusion clearly changed the mood of the meal. Scenes from next week indicate that things are about to get much much worse … and possibly violent.

The show airs Sundays at 10 on Bravo.

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