Patch Blogger: When I Grow Up I Want To Be a Fairy Princess

Lately I feel like an elementary school student filling out a questionnaire that states the question ‘What do I want to be when I grow up?’ The problem may be that I am filling it out like an elementary school student.

After I broke my own heart by making one of the toughest decisions I have ever been faced with making, I was left with a Peanuts like thought bubble looming over my head: Now what? Instead of falling victim to the uncertainty that laid itself out like a blanket over me while I slept, I decided to laugh at the foreboding fabric. Now what? I’ll tell you now what! Now, I have the opportunity to explore my options because HEY we’re in that thing that everyone cannot stop complaining about. You know the thing that many people my age are using as an excuse to stay on their parent’s couch for another four years? Yes, I mean the recession. Instead of looking at my change of paths as a negative I thought ‘maybe an economic recession could actually be the best thing to happen to me.’ Right?

Think about it. I could be using the recession as an excuse ‘I am certified in __________ and have a degree in ______________ but there is nothing out there.’ Actually there is plenty out there. But because accomplishments sometimes are worn as arrogance, we choose not to see what is really in front of us.

Do not get me wrong. Many people laid off or foreclosed on are victims to this challenging time, and I do not mean to scoff at any of that. The people I am talking to are the kids graduating High School or in College. Do not give up just because the news tells you to. Take it from one experiencing it.

Right now I work at a mall Kiosk. Yup, the day after I got my college degree I sat in the middle of the mall and catered to the masses. Is this something I want to be doing? Maybe not – but I saw an opportunity. Many of us are too proud to work a job that they may be over qualified for. But, think about what you are qualified in. I may be qualified in certain areas, but I could learn a lot by working for someone or something that I find intriguing. What is the worst that could happen? I decide it is not for me anymore and try to find something else? This has been my new adopted mantra.

A college degree is no longer the ‘safety net’ it once served as. Yes, it may still be a ticket into some exclusive clubs, but as far as finding a job, it does not always get you into the chocolate factory.

So student loans are expensive, certifications take work and maybe it does not seem worth it. But everyone is in debt right now, (even if we can still pay a baseball player close to 30 million dollars a year to get hurt and sit out a season, you know) so why not invest in yourself?

I have taken this crossroads in my life to be like a little kid. Sure, the Young Woman look has started to suit me, but I cannot help but play in the mud sometimes. It feels like I am picking ideas out of a hat when it comes to the question ‘What do I want to be when I grow up?’

In high school it is drilled in you to pass the tests, get the scores, write the pretty words and get to college. You go to college and major in something that you are supposed to use as a career path. It actually seems a little forced upon you to decide. At 18 you MUST know EXACTLY what you are going to do with the REST of your life or obviously you are an unmotivated screw up. Maybe I used to feel this way since that is how we are programmed to think.

 My answer since the second grade was ‘A Teacher’. Recently someone said to me ‘You know, you should really be a teacher.’ I mustered a smile and replied with ‘Yeah, I’ve heard that before.’ The words hit my stomach like a swift kick. I had to keep going though, no time to dwell. Maybe I’ll be a make-up artist, or a copy editor. How about a freelance writer or a wedding planner? The possibilities are endless for me and I like that. I set a few harmless goals for myself:

1)      Stay focused

2)      Do not be too hard on yourself

3)      If you are not happy, find a way to be happy

When my heel got stuck, I could have stubbornly broken it off, and continued walking with an uneven stride, but I’d be living a lie. While I may have had to hang up on my calling for now it does not mean that the phone will not ring later. Maybe instead of using these uncertain times as an excuse, my generation can use it as an opportunity to not be so hard on themselves. Innovation and initiative are two things that the conveyor belts we all line up on makes us lose sight of.

I think it is time for us to get all of that back.