Ask the RADAR Prevention Experts

To support parents in their effort to understand and reduce alcohol use by teens, we collected some of the most common questions we hear from parents…and then polled our prevention experts for answers.  Here are two new Q & As.  Check back next week for more.  Here's a link to last week's Q & A in case you missed it.                                

Q.  How can I tell if my teenager is drinking?  What are the signs to look for? 

A.  Be awake and alert when your teen comes home at night.  Try giving a hug and watch for hesitancy to hug you back. Notice any smell of alcohol or cover-up smells like mint. Have a brief conversation about their evening; look for lack of focus, hesitant or slurred speech, and uncoordinated movements. 

One of the benefits of a conservative curfew is that it enables parents to be awake and have this kind of interaction at the end of an evening. In general, stay connected with your teen: eat meals with them regularly, share a hobby, be around on weekend nights, get to know their friends, and stay in touch with their friends’ parents if possible.  If you do these things, you will likely have a good sense of whether your teen is drinking or not.  

Q.  We like to drink wine at home; how do we balance that with trying to tell our kids not to drink?  

A.  Explain to your teens that there is a drinking age for a reason—developing brains and bodies. It is very unhealthy for kids under 21 to drink: alcohol negatively impacts the development of the brain, the liver is not fully mature to handle toxins, and research shows that there is a much greater chance of alcohol dependency down the road if you start drinking in your teens.  There are many rules that apply to kids that do not apply to grown-ups—and vice versa—so it’s really not that hard for kids to grasp the concept.  

That being said, parents should lay the groundwork for moderation by modeling healthy behaviors when possible.  Actions speak louder than words, and teens have told us again and again that they watch everything their parents do. Our surveys do show a link between parents who drink regularly and teens who drink.  So you might want to be careful about how much and how often you drink in front of your kids.  Never drink excessively in front of them.

Try not to drink overtly in response to stress—“What a horrible day!  I need a glass of wine!"— they might decide to deal with teen stress in the same way.  And never drink and drive.  DO point out the responsible choices you are making, so your kids have the opportunity to learn from you.  

Please visit www.lmradar.org for more information.