Love and Same-Sex Marriage in Malverne

When the news broke that the New York Senate passed a marriage equality bill Friday night, Malvernite Sean Patrick Brennan's ears rang with the sound of wedding bells.

"My partner Andy and I haven't gotten married elsewhere yet, because we were waiting for the New York marriage equality bill to pass," he told Patch this week. "Now, that it will be law, we plan to make our engagement official soon."

Brennan and his partner have been together nearly a decade. Two years ago they bought their house in Malverne, a village which is now home to a small community of gay and lesbian couples.

Among them is Robert Powers, 51, and his husband Howard Costa, who married in Connecticut in 2008, shortly after the state adopted a marriage equality law.

The couple had already been together 18 years when they tied the knot - they actually wed on their anniversary. The committment was already there, but the rights and protections awarded to straight maried men and women were not.

It became most apparent when the couple fell on hard times. Costa was out of work and needed health insurance, but Powers could not add him to his plan.

"It was very difficult being unmarried," Powers said. "We couldn't share a lot of things."

The situation prompted them to take a drive to New Canaan, Conn. to elope one day in December, and the following year, they held a ceremony at their church in Rockville Centre to take their vows before 150 friends and family.

"We didn't want to wait for New York," he said. "We didn't know what year it would take hold. I didn't think I'd see it in my lifetime."

When he watched the Senate vote play out on his television Friday night, he said the results sent him into shock at first.

"Is this really happening?" he asked himself, and then proceeded to text virtually everyone in his phone. "It means just as much if not more because it's our home state. It shows people are finally seeing the light, that we don't want anything special just the same thing that my mother and father have."

Although he was disappointed that his local senator, Majority Leader Dean Skelos, did not vote in favor of the bill, that did not stop him from spending the weekend celebrating with close friends and glowing in satisfaction, he said.

Brennan had mixed emotions over Friday's vote. "Part of me is ecstatic that this historic bill has now passed, but I also feel very sad that something like equal rights would have to make history," he said. "How is this not common sense, you know?"

He is hopeful for younger generations, saying that they appear to have a better grasp on the issues and are more accepting.

" We've come so far, but kids today must look at all of this and think, what's the big deal?  Why are my parents and grandparents fighting against these people who just want the same rights as everyone else?" he said.

He believes these attitudes have created a better environment for today's gay youth, who are coming out at 14 or even younger.

"When I was growing up, I didn't think I would ever be able to tell anyone that I was gay," he recalled. "Finally, we are seeing gay kids able to have a normal adolescence and a healthy and happy childhood."

As for the opposition, Brennan says he has no tolerance for intolerance, saying that his response to those who use the Bible to condemn his sexuality is "Gay people have been here since Day 1.  I look at the Bible and see that gay people were always here and people were always fighting against us.  Obviously, we are and have always been a part of God's plan."

Powers hopes those who opposed this bill will take the opportunity to understand the issues, saying that it is a legal and not a religious matter.

For instance, he said, "If something happens to me and I pass away, Howard's protected." The marriage certificate would eliminate any legal battles that could erupt over his estate.

He too is optimistic about what the future holds for younger generations.

"I am hopeful that the next generation won't have to be as afraid and can be themselves and realize we're not freaks," he said. "I want them to realize that there are so many pressures in life, but you shouldn't have to worry about what's happening in your bedroom."

"I knew from the moment I met Howard he was the one. We have been through so much togther." He added, "I think we lead pretty normal lives."