More Than A

I think about death a lot these days for a variety of reasons.

I suppose my age is the primary reason, but also believe there are several others, including the stark repercussions of the unforeseen and now historic Covid trauma.

The dreaded coronavirus claimed many victims including my youngest sister. Shortly afterwards, my beautiful Goddaughter,Deborah, also departed on her final journey.

Both left far too soon or so it will ever seem to all those who loved them,

Despite a firm belief that those we love and lose are indeed in a better place (without pain or worry) their absence is significant,

And , I must admit I have never handled the formalities of the last goodbye well.

Therefore I was unprepared for the unexpected knock on my door earlier this morning,

When I opened it, I was alerted that Carol, my friend, was about to depart on Charon’s mythical ferry across the River Styx.

I heard the stark message: “You should go very soon and say goodbye.”

I knew I should and I knew I would, but I didn’t want to.

I had never said goodbye before,

The beloved Magician, my Dad, left this world as I was about to give birth to his first grandson

I was bedridden with a 104 degree fever when Mom breathed her last, and boarded the ferry.

And my beloved, my Anam Cara, gently closed his eyes as I was en route to his bedside. It was his final gift, shielding me from saying the dreaded “Goodbye.”

Yet Carol was down the hall and I knew I must go.

“The Queen of Crafting” and I had little in common when our paths crossed unexpectedly 6 years ago. I had arrived from NY on a cold Halloween’s night after a long drive to my new home in Michigan,

Carol Duvall was a well known and celebrated TV legend beloved by a vast audience for sharing her talents.

I can count the times I have held a needle or a pot of glue and must admit I had never watched her well loved show.

Somehow our computers crossed paths by accident and something I wrote arrived on hers. Carol immediately took the time and effort to locate me and from that moment on we became friends.

When she shared her love for Chocolate chip mint ice cream, I shared mine for croissants, coffee and conversation.

I understood today would be my last time to repay her kindness and murmur a final “goodbye” before the ferry with her reservation departed.

And so I did, hoping this lovely woman, famed as “The Queen of Crafting” television legend but also a beloved friend would somehow know how much she will be missed.