Time

This week following the patterns of other Shrove Tuesdays, I pondered about an appropriate item to “give up” during the forty days of Lent,

I recalled other years when I chose to relinquish candy or sometimes chocolate graham crackers.

That really wasn’t a difficult form of penance since I never have had a major problem with sweets (excluding butter pecan ice cream).

I then toyed with abstaining from coffee. Immediately I realized, however, that could easily provoke a panic attack, not a welcome event at my stage of life.

Since I rarely drink and never smoke, both were immediately eliminated as forms of penance.

Then on the very brink of the traditional season, I knew exactly what would be the most difficult thing for me to relinquish for the next forty days.

Instantly, I knew it was anxiety. An emotion I never welcomed, but one that has now become a constant companion.

And while it will be difficult for me to abstain I believe I can do it if I follow some simple rules.

I must forego recriminations as well as all jubilation about politics, including current, past and future administrations.

I must refuse to participate in doom and gloom predictions of bankruptcy for those in my generation. I am weary of feeling I may become a burden on my country if I live too long so it may be an easy choice.

And I will also abstain from current films or television productions with unsolicited messages. This will definitely also limit my nightly streaming sessions.

Perhaps my decision doesn’t seem like an appropriate sacrifice for the Lenten season.

Still I know anxiety will be far more difficult for me to eliminate than anything else I can think of.

And similar to all the other challenges life has provided it may also become a positive part of my waning days.

Time will tell.