Living in My Hometown: A Vow, Broken

About 15 years ago, Ed Feldstein, a well-loved Social Studies teacher at Felix Festa Middle School and a good friend of my family, turned to me at the dinner table. He was considering retiring from Clarkstown, but joked that he’d be willing to stay if he knew that we were moving to New City and he could have my then-toddler daughter Lissie in his class.

My answer? I looked him in the eye and said, “I will NEVER move to New City.”

I grew up here and remember being so ready to leave behind a place where the only thing to do on Saturday night was go to Rocco’s and the movies at the Clarkstown Mall. I wanted to live someplace better, more exciting…somewhere else.

Flash forward to 1999. My husband, Mat, was finishing his medical training and about to start as an attending doctor at Columbia-Presbyterian Medical Center in upper Manhattan. We were living in the Riverdale section of the Bronx and had two young children, so we did what every other Riverdalian did in that situation—we started looking at houses in Westchester.

The market was pretty crazy and we looked at dozens of “charming” (Realtor speak for tiny) houses in Dobbs Ferry, Ardsley, Chappaqua, Armonk, Hastings, Pelham, etc. Our favorite in our price range? The one in Armonk that 2 year old Josh walked into, saw the hole in the ceiling and exclaimed “Hey, I can see the sky.” The Realtors kept convincing us that the houses we were seeing were great starter houses and we looked at our two kids and our plans for a third and explained that we weren’t starting. One Saturday morning I scanned the real estate ads in the New York Times and there was this house for sale in New City. “4 BR, 2.5 BA, Cul de sac, Grt schls.” I was intrigued, called the owner and made an appointment to see the house.

A mind-spinning two days later, the house was ours. It all happened so quickly I didn’t know how to react to the fact I had done exactly what I had vowed not to do—return to live in New City. Our friends at our nursery school in Riverdale were a little snobby about it.

“You’re moving where?” they asked. We explained it was in Rockland County, just over the Tappan Zee Bridge, near Nyack and sometimes they had heard of it, sometimes not. We didn’t care. We chuckled to ourselves that the joke was on them as we got a much bigger house, on a quiet block with a nice piece of property. Yeah, Mat would have to drive a little further, but if he got over the bridge early, it was a shorter commute than some of the towns in Northern Westchester.

As time went on, we developed a fabulous network of friends here. We loved Little Tor Elementary School and as Lissie, Josh and Eric got busy, our roots in the community grew. The funny thing is that probably more than half of the couples we know have at least one spouse who grew up in Rockland. It can’t be that bad of a place if we all moved back here.

At times it can be surreal to live here. I’ll drive down a street I haven’t been down in 30 years and get overwhelmed by a long-lost memory. Liz Sweeney, a New City resident who also grew up here, summed it up well. “Everything seems the same except everything has changed. New people, new stores. I am still trying to get out of the habit of describing an area of what used to be there, like ‘The old Bradlees shopping center’ or ‘Make a right where the old post office used to be.’

"I still get startled when I run into a high school friend, even though I am in my hometown," Liz said.

Many unexpected things have happened since I’ve moved back to my hometown. Some highlights:

— Walking into Little Tor Elementary School for kindergarten orientation and being greeted by my old friends Nina Damiani and Maria DeFilippo, whose children were also at the school. They couldn’t have made me feel more welcome back in New City.

— Watching my son Eric on his first playdate with Austin Straniere, whose mom, Maria, was also my friend growing up. The boys play soccer together, along with Eric Halpern, whose mother Jill graduated with us, too. I love these second generation connections.

—Hanging out with my youth group advisors, Bernie and Faith Monkarsh because their daughter, Leslie Hollander, is a good friend of mine. Going to Josh’s basketball games at New City Elementary School, my alma mater, and smiling at the memories there.

—Sitting at Lissie’s seventh grade Parent/Teacher conference with Mr. Mastropolo and Mrs. Whitman, who were also my seventh grade English and Math teachers.

—Walking down the halls of Clarkstown North during that first Meet the Teacher Night, when I was faced with places I hadn’t thought of since my graduation in 1984.

—Having the support of Cyndi Sheridan, my 11th grade English teacher, after my novel was published. Among other things, Cyndi asked me to do an author visit with the Creative Writing Class at South and when I was there, I ran into my 11th grade Spanish teacher, Dianne Bellusci.

—Watching Lissie being inducted into the National Honor Society on the same stage I had been inducted.

— And hopefully next year I’ll be sitting on the same football field at North where I graduated, watching my son Josh play football there and seeing Lissie graduate there, too. Little did I know that the day after my North graduation, I would meet the guy that would one day become my husband. And I certainly never imagined that we’d move back to New City, so my kids, too, could hang out at Rocco’s and the Clarkstown Mall.

I like my hometown.

Have any of you grown up here and come back? We’d love to hear your thoughts.

Editor's note: Shari Maurer of New City is author of the novel Change of Heart. She grew up in New City and is now raising her family in New City. She is the discussion leader for New City Patch's new Moms Council.