LI Mom, Daughter Reeling From Loss Of Dad, Desperately Need New Home

ORIENT POINT, NY — With the summer season in full swing on the North Fork, many are enjoying barbecues and beach days, soaking in the joys of life in a place many call paradise. But for one mother and her daughter — blindsided by the sudden, unthinkable loss of a devoted father — the days are dark with worry and fear as, with the clock ticking, they search desperately for a new place to live.

A GoFundMe page, "Help For The Family of Ethan Whittington," was created by Lisa Craven.
"Abby Whittington, 15, recently suffered the sudden loss of her father Ethan after a brief battle with cancer," Craven wrote. "She and her mother Jennifer Sickler are facing a difficult road ahead as they deal with this loss and try to cover expenses and secure housing so Abby can finish school in her current district."

Along with the staggering loss, Sickler was told she had until June 30 to leave the rental home where she's lived for 17 years — and now, with the deadline passed, she's trying to find somewhere close to home, so her daughter can remain in a familiar, comforting environment so soon after the loss of her father.

Sickler has tried her best to move ahead despite her grief, even organizing a yard sale to raise funds for her move.

This weekend, desperate for options, Sickler reached out on social media: "Four months ago my partner of 19 years and Abby's father Ethan Whittington suddenly passed away from cancer."

One week later, she was notified that she needed to move from the home where she has lived for 17 years in Orient, Sickler said.

She added: "Every single option that I found has fallen through, the most recent being last week. I need to leave — and I need to figure this out now. The last four months have been incredibly difficult, as we have not been able to properly grieve or even have services for Ethan Whittington. I have been working around the clock to pack the house and to find some place else to live. Each and every backup plan has failed."

Sickler is searching for any and all ideas and options. Anyone with suggestions is asked to email her at Nofoposhproducts@gmail.com

As it stands, Sickler, who has significantly pared down her possessions, and is moving the rest to a friend's barn. She and her daughter are currently staying with friends — for now.

"Two-bedroom and even one-bedroom apartments are still too expensive," she said.

However, Sickler said she believes what is meant to be, will be, and she is trying to remain positive and open to ideas.

"I am hoping for a situation that is mutually beneficial for us and someone else, perhaps as a caretaker or sharing a space in someone's home, that we are able to help in some way. Maybe someone who spends very little time here, and needs someone to care for their home? I am willing to be very flexible and creative," Sickler said.

Sickler's background is in interior design, and she is an artist, who also has also had a cleaning and professional organizing business for many years — and who has worked on and off in food services.

"I have been a property caretaker, a project manager, and a designer for an interior design firm," Sickler said.

Her daughter Abby, Sickler added, is the president of the Gay-Straight Alliance, or GSA, at Greenport High School and is an honor student.

"If I had my wish it would be to have housing security all whilst helping someone else, doing something that I'm good at, and that is meaningful," Sickler said.

Whittington worked at the Greenport location of Riverhead Building Supply for the past 16 years and was a familiar face on the North Fork canvas, well-loved by many.

"Jen may be known to many in her community for her work at Trumans Beach in East Marion and at the Orient Country Store," Craven said. "Due to Ethan's untimely death, Abby and Jen have an immediate need for unplanned expenses. Please consider donating any amount to help Abby and Jen through this tragic time."

Whittington died Sunday, Feb. 5 after a brief illness and cancer.

At 15, Abby is emotionally mature and wise beyond her years, her mother said.

"I am floored by her insights about life, death, and this unexpected turn that our journey has taken. She has been described by one of her teachers as a 'bright star' even in the midst of this challenge. She plans to go into the field of psychology, which she is perfectly fitted for," she said.

"This unexpected tragedy hits from all angles. Without a will prepared, I have been left in a financially precarious situation, all while trying to remain strong and walk through the many stages of grief, now and to come. Ethan and my shared goal was to have Abby finish all four years of high school without interruption, but sadly, that may not happen," Sickler said.

And now, Sickler is finding her way forward, trying, through the blanket of grief, to ensure that her daughter is surrounded by all that she knows and loves in the difficult days ahead without her dad.

She added: "I keep saying that Abby has to finish school here — but maybe God has a different plan," she said.

Her hope is that the plan will allow her girl to finish up high school in the place where she thrives academically and is known as a "little activist," helping to organize a walkout to support a teacher in April.

"Abby is always standing up for what's right for other people," she said. "She's just a great kid, and people recognize that. If I can, at the very least, find a way for her to be able to finish school and not have to move . . . . We're in shock. She just lost her father."

No matter what paths their lives take, Sickler said her broken heart has been bolstered by the outpouring of caring from the community, from those who've stepped forward to comfort and guide.

"I am so grateful, just so filled with gratitude for those who reached out to help," she said. "Ethan and I, we had a partnership, in raising and loving our daughter and making sure her life was full. He was a wonderful, wonderful father."

To donate to the GoFundMe, click here.

To reach out to Sickler, email Nofoposhproducts@gmail.com.

Patch is a GoFundMe promotional partner.