Mom Who Accused Man Of Abusing Daughter, 5: 'It's Been Horrific'

NORTH FORK, NY — A mother who said her daughter, 5, was abused by a former bus driver and janitor for the Southold school district told Patch she pressed charges and came forward with her child's story to protect others.

According to Southold Town Police Chief Martin Flatley, Joseph Flythe, 40, was arrested on Sunday at 1:11 p.m. at the Vineyard View apartment complex in Greenport; he was arrested on a Suffolk County Police Department warrant for a grand jury indictment warrant, Flatley said.

Court records indicate that Flythe was charged with first-degree sex conduct against a child, a felony; he was also charged with acting in a manner injurious to a child, and with sexual abuse toward a child, court records indicate.

The woman, whose name Patch will not reveal to protect her minor daughter's identity, said with Flythe's arrest, " what my daughter has endured has finally come to an end."

According to the child's mother, the incident took place in April and involved Flythe, who is a family member.

Her daughter, now 6, was watching a movie with Flythe and others, she said.

When her daughter got home, she said, she told her mother the story, accusing Flythe of physical abuse.

"She told me instantly what happened," the woman said. Her daughter had reportedly been sitting on a small couch with Flythe, under a blanket, with others present in the room, when the incident took place, she said.

Her daughter's account of what transpired never changed, despite multiple retellings, first to police and later, at the Suffolk County District Attorney's office. The process of finding justice took months, the child's mother said.

And, she said, she was not the only mother to press charges: Flythe is facing sexual abuse cases involving another child, as well, according to court documents.

Describing the months since her child came to her, she said, "It has been horrific. I feel like I lost my daughter to trauma."

Her little girl is not the same person, she said; she wets the bed and, afraid of the dark, won't go to the bathroom alone and suffers from night terrors. "She's not the same person she was, before this happened," she said.

Personally, her mother, too, said she has suffered depression and has had to change jobs because she said she is afraid to leave her daughter for long periods of time.

The day she and her child met with the DA, she said, was one of the best days of her life, as the light of justice began to dawn.

Once Flythe was arrested, she said, "so much pressure was lifted from my chest," she said.

The last months have not been easy, she said. "There were so many times I felt like giving up, when it felt like we weren't getting anywhere with this case." But on the day, her daughter's accused abuser was arrested, she said, "I felt like I had given birth again. It was one of the best moments of my life."

The mom said she felt compelled to come forward to protect others from the man accused of hurting her child.

"It's a hard story to tell," she said. "But that's why I want to bring this to every platform."

This week, after the court proceedings, the relieved mom said she felt "thankful and overwhelmed. Court left me speechless with a whirlwind of emotions. I'm not satisfied yet — this is just the start. I never thought I would be the mother fighting for my daughter against sex crimes from a family member — but life throws daggers at you for a reason."

The mother said she is often asked how she is, if she is okay. "No, but my daughter is finally receiving justice," she said.

To her child, she said: "Thank you, baby girl, for speaking up and being brave. You are so courageous and you deserve the world for what you’ve been through."