You Are Feeling Thinner, Thinner, Thinner 'Mom'ory

So, there must be one smart woman out there managing the empire of my now-favorite store.

Shop there and you'll lose one dress size instantly! What a novel idea, guaranteeing self-esteem with a trip to the dressing room. Now, I know my size like the back-of-my-hand and I am not deceived easily by sales people (I used to be one). I'm a *, but on a bad day, an *. Well, at my magical happy place, I am a 4!

Yes, you are reading correctly.

Women, come closer and pay attention.

There is a clothing store for us that has defied all clothing stores. Walk in and you are transformed. Maybe it's the lack of ROYGBIV that, too often, confuses us in the monstrosity of the mall. The specialty here is shades and tints, not colors. Talk to the staff and they'll have you believing you should be on a runway. I should get a job there just to learn how they lure the clientele. Is it hypnosis? The women were soft-spoken, perhaps almost monotone.

You are feeling thinner, you are feeling thinner. 

No, I would remember that. 

As I sit here in my size 4 jeans, I think back to that most-fabulous shopping trip. Did the air smell different? Were the mirrors taller like in those fun houses at the amusement park? Was the lighting dimmed to obscure my view of any flesh flapping around? I can't say as I remember anything other than feeling like I just won 'The Biggest Loser'.

It's amazing that it has taken this many years for someone to realize that women would buy more if their egos were stroked a bit (btw, I bought 2 pairs of $88 jeans that day). It's as simple as black-and-white, really....most women would buy a dress because of the smaller size tag (despite the larger price tag).

Now that I think about it, it must be in the way they design their clothes as well as the way they design their 'little helpers ladies' because you actually do look thinner in them, even at home and without the saleswoman's non-critical critique. You feel like a beautiful woman in anything you put on, and why shouldn't you?

See, I should get a job there.

So, thank you, oh worthy one, for the weight loss without all the weights and the boost to my womanhood without all the therapy.