Parenting Strategies

“Structure” Parent Vs “Friend” Paren

Your parenting responsibility does not end after bringing a baby into this world. In fact, it is just the beginning of a long and unpredictable journey wrought with sleepless nights and frustration.

Along the way, as you get to learn more about your child, you discover ways to mold this individual into the well-rounded adult that this society can accept.

Well, there are different ways to bring up a child. In addition, whether you like it or not, your parenting style determines the kind of person he could turn out to be in the end.

There’s many different types of parenting. But sometimes, parents fall into these two categories: the “friend” parent or the “structure” parent.

Below are descriptions of how these two main parenting styles work. Identify which type you are more like and discover how your parenting can affect your child’s psychological and emotional growth.

The “Structure” Parent

Structure parenting is the quintessential strict parent who enforces rules and always sets boundaries. For them, it is always “my way or the highway.”

They expect blind obedience from their children and tend to be emotionally distant. They allow little open communication between them, or none at all. As a result, their kids do not open up to them.

Since structure parents tend to never involve their kids in problem solving, their children often end up suffering from low self-esteem or depression. They are most likely to harbor resentment or anger towards their parents.

Structure parenting can suppress a child’s creativity and leadership potential.

The “Friend” Parent

As the polar opposite of the “structure” parent, the “friend” parent tends to be indulgent rather than exacting. Instead of setting boundaries, they would use bribery. Often, they give in to their children’s whims. They are lenient and non-confrontational in their approach to parenting.

The “friend” parent is more loving and nurturing. They are their children’s best friend. Their lives often revolve around their children and they would do everything for them to the point that their children never learn to do things by themselves.

“Friend” parenting enables the following behaviors in children: self-centeredness; lack of discipline; poor social skills; defiance; and poor academic performance.

Striking the Balance Between “Friend” and “Structure”

There are obvious disadvantages to both of these parenting styles. If you are strict, you can end up with emotionally unavailable children. They could grow up to be disciplined and successful, but they could also end up bitter and resentful.

If you are a friend to your children, chances are you have established an open and loving relationship with them. However, the lack of discipline can be detrimental to their emotional growth in the end.

If you want to raise loving, successful and conscientious adults, then learn to strike the perfect balance between the two parenting spectrum.

“Structure” parents should try to be more considerate of their kid’s feelings by being open to a dialogue with them. If you are used to getting your way, maybe it is high time that you involve your children in some decision making. This kind of discipline will eventually work to their advantage.

If you are the “friend” parent, you need to have a firmer stance. If you are having problems making them follow your rules, enroll them in competitive or combative sports. Practicing martial arts can help them learn and appreciate the value of discipline.

Mixing some tough love with just the right measurement of friendship makes an excellent recipe for parenting.