The Train In Vain: The iPad Hero

Don’t you hate when you leave behind something important? It happens to people on the train all the time.

On Friday, I got out of the office on the early side and headed to the rat hole that is Penn Station, along with 829,609 other people. Got a great seat, pulled Alan Paul’s One Way Out, the Inside History of the Allman Brothers Band from my bag, and read about Duane’s sessions with Eric Clapton. The time flew by and before I knew it, I was in Hicksville.

I closed the book and stepped out onto the platform. Just then, someone about 20 feet ahead of me screamed. “Excuse me! Sir! Excuse me!” What was going on?

I pulled my earbuds out to better hear what was going on. There was a man holding something up in his hand. It was lime green, and at first I thought it was a book. He stood with one foot on the platform and one foot inside the train. “EXCUSE ME !!!” he yelled again. A few of us looked at him, wondering to whom he was talking.

As I walked closer to the yelling man, I could see that he was holding an iPad Mini in a green case. In the crude drawing, he’s the guy labeled, “iPad Hero.” I’m the guy labeled “Me,” and you can see from the arrow that I was walking toward him.

How do you like my latest crude drawing? Do you like the illusion of depth? I’m so proud of myself. My stick figures have really grown, even if the image of me looks like a squat spider. I tried to draw steps going down from the platform, but they looked more like a wifi signal indicator than actual stairs. I erased them because a man has to respect his limitations.

Ok, back to the story.

You can see from the crude drawing that the person who lost the iPad, who is labeled “iPad Loser,” was walking away from the iPad Hero.

By the way, I recognize that the term “iPad Loser” may have negative connotations. Let me point out that I do not know if the person who left the iPad behind is a loser in a general sense. My usage of “iPad Loser” is to identify a person who lost an iPad. Technically, he’s an iPad Loser. But in life, he could be a winner. For all I know, he has a room in his house full of archery and skee-ball championship trophies. That’s a winner, in spite of his status as an iPad Loser. Does that clarify?

Ok, now REALLY back to the story.

“Excuse me!” yelled the hero. iPad Loser turned around, and I heard, “Oh SH!T!” as he ran past me and gushed his gratitude to our hero. iPad Loser and iPad were reunited, and everyone lived happily ever after. Ok, maybe that’s a stretch. But the guy had his technology back in his possession, and I had a story to tell here on TTIV.

I hope the iPad Hero puts on a pair of jeans today that he hasn’t worn in a long time and finds, to his astonishment, a $50 bill in the pocket that he’d long since forgotten about. He deserves a happy surprise.

**

Happy and safe commuting, and may you encounter uncommon sense.

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