Long Island Teen Who Saved Mom From Choking: 'It Was Terrifying'

SMITHTOWN, NY — "‘Mom, are you OK?’"

No response.

"‘Mom, are you choking? Mom, nod your head if you’re choking.’"

Kim Desthers, 43, nodded her head.

Sarah Desthers, 15, ran over to her mother and performed the Heimlich maneuver. The spoonful of leftover rice that Kim had eaten for a late-night snack flew out of her mouth and onto the kitchen floor of the Desthers' Smithtown home around 10 p.m. Jan. 12.

Rewind to a few moments before the incident.

John Desthers, Sarah's father and an FDNY firefighter, was fast asleep. Sarah's own eyelids were shutting, and her two younger siblings were either fast asleep or doing homework.

Sarah was fading out of consciousness when she was startled by a gagging noise. She thought it was one of the family's dogs, got nervous, and decided to investigate. She walked into the living room, and her dogs were OK. Then, she turned to the kitchen.

"My mom had her hands around her throat, and she was making this weird noise," Sarah told Patch. "I can’t even describe it. It was terrifying."

Kim, after eating the spoonful of rice, said she could not swallow it or transfer air. She tried to chase the grains down with water, but the water was rejected and fell out of the sides of her mouth. Although she made enough noise to alert Sarah.

Sarah gave Kim the Heimlich maneuver, and after two attempts at it, the rice came out. Sarah had saved her mother's life.

Sarah said "everything" was going through her mind as she performed the maneuver.

"'What if this doesn’t work? What if it’s too late? What if my mom dies?’ I was in a panic, but at the same time, you have to just save that for later and do what you know how to do," she said.

What Sarah knew how to do worked, and she said it felt like "10,000 bricks" were lifted from her shoulders.

Kim said Sarah could have awoken John, but when every moment is crucial when someone is choking, she was amazed by her daughter's reaction time, she said.

When Kim began choking, she said she didn't think to go to John, who is fully trained in rescue tactics. She froze in place, but her mind was racing.

"I was thinking, ‘Oh my God, this is not happening. I’m not going to make this,’" Kim said. "I was freaking out."

Kim, who is trained in CPR and first aid herself, said she would have reacted better if someone in her family was choking. But with her life on the line, she admitted she was terrified for the two minutes it took for her to alert Sarah and be saved.

Kim recalled her thoughts as Sarah grabbed her and went to perform the maneuver.

"'This kid’s going to try to do the Heimlich, and I’m going to die, and she’s going to blame herself.’ That was one of my fleeting thoughts. And then [the rice] came right out. ‘OK, we’re good. Let’s continue cleaning up the kitchen,'” Kim said with a laugh.

As soon as the rice came out, Kim knew her daughter had saved her life.

"I couldn’t be more proud of her," she said. "What 15-year-old knows how to do that? What 15-year-old makes the decision that ‘OK, this is what we’re doing.’ She could have easily could have just started screaming for her dad to get up and come to the kitchen. She was like, ‘Nah, I’m doing it. No time to waste.’”

Sarah, a 10th grader at Smithtown High School West, learned the Heimlich maneuver at the school's First Aid/CPR health course, taught by Cherie Diamond, a first aid instructor and health teacher.

"You can't ask for anything more as an educator than for your students to take the information you teach them and apply it to their lives," Diamond said. "Not only did Sarah Desthers do this, but she saved her mom's life in the process. I couldn't be more proud as a teacher!"

Sarah's quick-witted approach was one of the details that impressed Kim the most. Diamond aims to teach her first aid class students how to mentally handle crises and emergencies, as well as how to manage their emotions when helping someone in need. Physical first aid skills go hand in hand with the mental abilities to stay calm during emergencies, according to Diamond.

"You never know when you will need first aid skills," Diamond said. "It could be done on a parent, friend, or acquaintance. It is an invaluable skill that everyone should be taught."

Sarah agrees with her teacher. She urged all school districts to teach students how to perform lifesaving abilities like the Heimlich maneuver.

“Definitely include it, because you never know until something like that happens to you," Sarah said. "CPR or the Heimlich can come in real handy one day."