Surprise Surprise: Life Begins At The End Of Your Comfort Zone

This past weekend, I attended back-to-back surprise birthday parties on Saturday and Sunday. One was for my friend Nick. The other was for my Aunt Bonnie. Maybe it’s just me, but I must admit I think it’s strange. I can barely remember the last time I even went to a surprise party and then two pop up in one weekend. Coincidence? I don’t believe in them. When I come across these types of synchronicities, I use them as an opportunity to reflect. We are the authors of our own stories. Do coincidences have meaning? It’s up to the author. In my story, the world around me is a reflection of the world within me. In my story, everything has meaning.  Every day is an opportunity to learn life lessons. And the most beautiful lessons are often marked by synchronicities.

Surprise parties always make me a little bit nervous. Nobody wants to be the person that ruins the surprise. You either need to get to the party on time or come later after the surprise. But if you walk in at the wrong time, that’s it, you’ve ruined everything. You’ve destroyed months of planning and hard to keep secrecy. I’d rather be early than late so you can be sure I was there for the surprise. The look on Nick’s face was priceless. He was completely stunned. It was obvious that we had effectively pulled this off without him knowing anything about it. It was so relieving and exciting. Being busy guys with girlfriends, we let a couple years pass without hanging out with each other. This was a great opportunity to reconnect with a good friend.

Even though Nick and I hadn’t talked in a while, he mentioned that he had read a few of my Monday Meditations. It was funny; he started to ask where my girlfriend was and remembered mid sentence, “Oh wait, never mind! I actually read your article about that.” It was awesome to hear that even though we haven’t spoken much, he’s still reading what I put out there. I guess that’s the magic of social media. But I was still surprised. Even though the party was for Nick, there was an element of surprise for everyone involved. We all had that building anticipation for the moment he would walk in and the uncertainty of how it would all go. We all put ourselves on the line at the risk of having a good time. “This is awesome,” said Nick, “I’ve never even had a party at my house. Dude I’ve known you for years and I don’t even think you’ve ever been in my backyard. This is so weird and so cool at the same time.”

The surprise party for my Aunt Bonnie was at a restaurant called Yerba Buena in the West Village of Manhattan. According to their website, “Yerba Buena presents an innovative take on Latin cuisine… [with] flavors of Cuba, Peru, Chile, Mexico, and Argentina.” The seven of us ordered family style. We sampled different cocktails, appetizers, and entrees. It was phenomenal. At this restaurant, every dish is prepared with a unique blend of ingredients and spices. No two tasted the same. If you’re looking for innovative Latin food in the West Village, I highly recommend this place. The experience as a whole was great. My Aunt was so surprised and happy to see us. This time it was just my Dad and I that were the surprise. That felt kind of special. Plus, I love hanging out with my aunt and my cousins.

After dinner, the plan was to head to The Comedy Cellar for the eight o’clock show. As we approached the entrance, I had a strange feeling of déjà vu. My cousin Bryan turned to me and said, “This is the comedy club on the show Louie. In the opening credits, he walks into that pizza place right there, eats a slice, and then heads into The Comedy Cellar.” Wow. Now that was weird. Just the night before, I had watched a few episodes of Louie for the first time. Just the night before I had seen those opening credits for the first time. Looking back, it was as if I were seeing a preview of my life. One day I’m looking at The Comedy Cellar for the first time on my television screen. The next day I’m not only standing in front of it, but seeing a show inside of it. Another coincidence? You can decide. The show was hysterical. We laughed at pretty much every comedian except Colin Quinn. I think he was the most famous person there but the least funny. Who knows, maybe he was just having an off night. The closer for the show was SNL’s John Mulaney. He killed it. His performance was by far the most outstanding.

So what is the lesson here? Surprises are good. Each day, many of us become entrenched within the same daily routine. We become creatures of ritual and habit. If we don’t mix it up every once in a while, life can become monotonous. When we repetitively perform the same patterns, we are barely living. We are merely running on autopilot as life passes us by.  It is when we throw ourselves into the unknown that we are truly most alive.

This week, let’s meditate on breaking a pattern. Do something that you have never done before. Surprise yourself. If you want, you can throw someone a surprise party. But it doesn’t have to be that. It can be anything. If you usually go to the bars on the weekend, try going to a museum. If you usually watch a movie at home, try going to a comedy club. If you usually play video games, go out and play laser tag. You get the point. Whatever patterns you are a part of, recognize them. Find a fun and exiting way to break them. As old and cliché as the Neale Donald Walsch saying may be, it still holds true: “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.” 

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