Intergalatic Maple Syrup

With the advances in technology over the years, things we once thought of as science fiction are quickly becoming part of our everyday lives.  First there was television, then color television, then cable, then satellite, then high-def.  Operator-assisted phone switch boards were replaced with automatic switching and rotary phones, then digital.  Now almost everyone has a cell phone- I-pod-date book-calculator-address book-internet connection-navigation-portable-personal computer.  Pong, 8-track tapes, The Clapper, Chia-Pets, personal nose hair trimmers, Life Alert, the tummy trimmer…the list of technical innovations which have made our lives easier and more enjoyable is never-ending.

What was thought to be impossible and the stuff of science fiction writers has become commonplace.  There was Sputnik, the moon landing…if you believe it wasn’t just a movie set conspiracy…Sky Lab, Mir, Voyager, the space shuttle, the Hubble telescope and the International Space Station.  NASA is planning to return to the moon by 2020 and there are plans for finally making it to Mars.  But what do you think would happen if we someday obtain the technology to travel to other worlds outside our solar system?

There are about 500-million stars in our galaxy and there’s estimated to be between 100 and 125 billion galaxies in the universe.  Let’s for a second say conservatively each solar system in each galaxy has at least one planet…some may have more and some none.  Now let’s assume one in nine of those solar systems has a planet which could “support” some sort of life, i.e. intelligent bacteria, talking tofu, Gungans…thanks George Lucas for that annoying culture…Klingons, etc.  I chose one in nine because earth is one of nine planets in our solar system we know has intelligent life…although that would be hard to confirm if you were an alien who landed in the parking lot during a NASCAR race at Darlington.  And yes, I still consider Pluto a planet. 

If my math’s correct, that’s something in the ball park of 55,000,000,000,000,000 possible planets which could support life.  Even if the number were just a fraction, those odds certainly point to the possible existence of some type of living creatures elsewhere in the universe.

Regardless of how life started, if we could visit one of these planets, or even begin to inhabit it, what would be the consequences for those life forms who already call, let’s say Endor, home.  Thanks also for that one, George.

Star Trek’s Federation of Planets had enough forethought to have the “Prime Directive” which dictated there can be no interference with the internal affairs of other civilizations.  For “pre-warp” civilizations, no primitive culture could be given or exposed to any information regarding advanced technology or the existence of extra-planetary civilizations, as not to interfere with the natural development of the civilization.  But what if the planet was inhabited by dolphins, monkeys, or some other type of life form who we perceive to be less-intelligent?  What then?

We exploit what we perceive to be lesser-creatures every day.  We regularly eat plants and animals…you vegans aren’t innocent either…put them to work, make furniture out of them, pen them up, utilize them as companions and or as shopping-spree fashion accessories, and most of us don’t think twice about it.  What if Endor was full of intelligent maple trees and the human intergalactic explorers were from Vermont.  Even though the Vermonters might be educated scholars, they most likely wouldn’t speak Mapleesse and wouldn’t realize what sounds to them like wind, is actually tree-speak.  Would it be morally or ethically acceptable for them to drill holes in the inhabitants to tap them like a half-keg of Miller Lite at a frat party so they could have sweeter pancakes on their intergalactic cruiser, just because they assume the leaf-wearing, sweetly sticky, sap-filled Endorians were just dumb plants?

I think the human race has a lot of moral and ethical dilemmas to work out before we decide to set foot on another planet…although the moon is okay because it’s a big hunk of unintelligent rock like Jessica Simpson’s brain.  Just something to think about the next time you go shopping with your Yorkshire terrier, eat a tofu burger or have French toast for breakfast…

Marc “Wiggy” Kovacs - Purveyor of Planetary Principles