Today I’m grateful I don’t worry. If I worried, then I’d be awake at five in the morning wondering what to do about my recent ant invasion. I’m glad I’m past that.
If I worried, then I’d have angst about my schedule, the week ahead, my hair, the wrinkly carpet, the mildew on the patio, the bird seed scattered everywhere and the fact that no birds have actually started to nest in the houses and why don’t they like them. . .me?
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Because I don’t worry I don’t have to wonder when they’ll mow the lawn, or what I’m going to wear to dear Wally’s funeral, or if my sons will be happy, or if my friends feel I neglect them, or if it’s wrong to want some quiet time, or if it’s okay to NOT want quiet time at the same time as you want quiet time.
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If I worried then I’d have to believe every horrible piece of news I read or hear on the radio or TV and I just don’t have time for that because I have to worry about whether I should throw out the horrible cookies I made from oatmeal and mashed banana that someone said were “great” and had no points or calories to speak of because they don’t have one good tasting thing in them anyway, but “boy are they good”, except to me they taste like an old insert in a sneaker only with more texture. Out they go!
If I worried I’d be consumed with thoughts of money and the lack thereof, and whether I’ve overstayed my welcome with gratitude posts, or if that spot on my leg is from the sun, or what I’m going to do when everyone of my eyebrow hairs turn gray.
Because I don’t worry, I’m fine with people getting older around me while I seem to stay the same age. In my mind. If I worried, then I’d wonder if I’ll ever be able to wear a pair of corduroy pants without starting a friction fire and I don’t even like corduroy pants. If I worried my thoughts would bounce around like the balls in a berserk bingo basket and I would have a hard time grabbing the B-12 vitamin which AARP magazine says I probably need.
I’m glad I don’t worry if I’ve lost my sense of humor, if I’m grim, or morose, or lacking creativity, or tired, or dull, or as annoying as Twiggie at an Overeaters Anonymous Convention.
I’m grateful I don’t worry anymore. I don’t have time. I have to get rid of ants.
