Back To The Suture

I'd like to offer my blog () as a posthumous tribute to Andy Rooney along with the ABC network.

Next to Erma Bombeck, Rooney's commentary was unparalleled. But, in the coming year, I feel the need to go beyond editorializing to prognostication. Yes, I will need to approach next year's situations from the rear where we can't put a pretty, or even a happy, face on the serious matter to be treated. Not to be crude, but I will need to dip my latex-gloved finger in the churning water of concern and controversy; I will probably take a lot of c**p for it.

What was helpful, though after the fact, about editorial comment is saddled up against when prognosticating. We will need to "go there" and probe to get to the bottom of the matter. Some of you will be tickled, some disturbed, and many oddly incited to act in response to a less than appealing examination of things.

Nothing and no one will be left behind, though many want to be, as I push forward with my diagnosis. Movements and what Americans are being fed will be my specialty, though what gets you fed-up will be my pleasure to explore. We'll clear the air and sometimes the room as well.

It probably won't be a pleasant experience, nor will you necessarily look forward to what comes next. It's a dirty business, but someone has to do it. Would you rather I close off the opening that presents itself and leave problems in the dark? Surely it would just be a matter of time before you had to face the fact that we humans are full of dung.

No, I'm behind you 100 percent with the future forecast. There's no appointment needed, but it can't hurt to eat my oats and clear your constipation.

I can promise that even if it's not a good ride, it'll have your head spinning.