'Get Real, Get Angry and Get Over It' Springfield- A Long Way from 'Sex and the City'

"Get real, get angry, and get over it!"

Continued from the previous post

*Names have been changed.

A rough couple of days soon turned into a rough couple of weeks and eventually months. I truly thought the possibility of a light at the end of the tunnel was simply nonexistent. I did everything I possibly could to avoid facing the issue head on. I avoided all of the things that reminded me of him like the plague, for fear of the pain (and tears) it would cause.

But what I know now, that I certainly didn't know then, was that facing the pain head on was the best way of dealing with it. When I was driving and saw a car that resembled Ryan's* I'd look the other way. I even took a longer route home in the evening to avoid having to go past the last resturaunt where we had dinner. Like I said, I was a mess.

I had isolated myself from my friends and my favorite activities and the whole time the only one I was punishing was myself. And for what?

For the longest time I in fact thought I did do something wrong, so somehow I deserved all of this emotional torture. I would constantly think about the last few things I may have said to him or the way I acted, what could it have been? 

Nothing, it was nothing. I could never get an answer, no matter how hard I tried. And believe me, I tried. He had obviously moved on, and it was time for me to do so, but how do you move on when you have absolutely zero closure? 

Closure,  such a simple little word that means so much. Why do we women put so much emphasis on that when a relationship goes sour?  It's a shame because it's the lack of this little word than can ultimately destroy a person's world. If everyone always received closure, I feel there would be a lot less hate towards our exes, (haha okay, maybe not, but it was worth a try.) Why isn't the man ever begging for "closure" or the acknowledgment of "why?" who knows, I certainly don't, but it was definitely all I had wanted from Ryan*.  

I mean, after all, if you only watch the beginning of a movie and stop dead in the middle, how are you supposed to know how it ends? No matter how many times you guess, or try to come up with your own ending, it will never be the true story.

Then one day, after some sulking, crying, pouting and junkfood eating, a friend of mine suggested I take a look at this book she once read which really helped give her some insight.

At first I thought, "really?" I'm not much of a reader other than the news and entertainment magazines. In order to read something it really has to spark my interest. So expecting some cheesy self help book I said, "Sure, why not." The book was called, "It's Called a Breakup Because it's Broken" clever title huh? And this book, was probably the best thing that has ever happened to me. 

Now, I know what your thinking, "Oh so all I need to do is read a book and I'll be healed? This woman is nuts." No, that's definitely not what I'm saying, and that's definitely NOT what happened, but reading this book really helped me see a little clearly and get closer to that light at the end of the tunnel and it's funny as hell. 

It's a book about all sorts of relationships and testimonials from real people and surprisingly you'll find that there's people out there who are even more psycho than you could ever possibly be, which is why I said, it's hilarious. It's definitely worth a read.

After reading this book, I was finally starting to get pissed off and it certainly wasn't with me. It was time for me to face the music and to rip off that bandaid in one shot, rather than little by little which is what I had been doing for months. 

More Soon!

Keep Shining :)

Lauren