Yes, But Will It Fetch Your Slippers? House-Broken Buffalo For Sale In North Texas

ARGYLE, TX -- It's been said that everything is bigger in Texas. A Craigslist ad originating from North Texas detailing a pet buffalo for sale attests to that notion.

"Yes, Bullet is tame and housebroken," the lady looking to sell her pet buffalo, Bullet, writes.

And just in case you thought you misread the ad, she assures the buffalo is an indoor pet, albeit likely not one suited for the lap while watching the television: "Yes, I've had her in my house! She followed me down the hallway and hung out in my bedroom too."

Big selling points: "She is perfectly gentle and content to hang out as long as I'd let her," the current owner writes. "She does not potty in the house."

Before trying to find a new owner for the well-behaved buffalo, the woman says she had planned to build an outside patio porch room where Bullet "...could come in and hang out while we watched the sunset and BBQ'ed."

Those architectural plans seem to have been placed on hold for reasons not detailed in the advertisement. But this is another matter entirely; the point is that Bullet is a great house pet -- and playful, too, the woman conveys in the ad.

"Bullet loves to chase and spar with a riding lawn mower, wheel barrow or even my truck when I'm out in the field," she writes. "She will follow me when I'm in the truck. She is like a precious gigantic dog herself."

The owner wishes for Bullet to go to a good home, one in which she would be assured human contact. The animal is "imprinted," after all, the woman writes, meaning that she's had human contact since birth and is accustomed to such inter-species interaction.

"I really do wish for Bullet to go with another buffalo (or a small herd)," the woman begins wistfully enough. "But do not want her to be turned out into acreage where she has no human contact."

Yet suddently -- perhaps inadvertently, maybe while unconsciously cracking under the pressure of caring for an eight-year-old, half-ton pet (housebroken or not) -- the ad's prose takes on darker, more worrying undertones related to the buffalo's ....let's say spirited... temperament.

"She pastures with minis, my Percheron Sampson [that's actually the horse variety Sampson Percheron, but, hey, tomato tahmato] and Bambam my stallion," the woman writes. "She knocked off one of her horns when she was in a round pen and it is growing back nicely!"

She offers no details about this horn displacement incident. She does note the horses (presumably her "minis") also are for sale, however.

"She has been in with my horses and she will boss them around," the woman adds in an interesting sales pitch.

Needless to say, Bullet probably shouldn't be left alone with children. But that's just common sense, and everyone knows this about house buffalo.

"She is still a buffalo, after all, and should never be left alone in your house or with children," the woman writes. "She must be revered and respected as a buffalo."

On the upside, Bullet is famous: "She was featured in the children's book Heaven is for Animals by Nancy Tillman [actually, the volume is titled The Heaven of Animals because we checked]. "Nancy visited Bullet and they too hung out for a while as the book was in production."

The woman writing the ad also provides some buffalo fun facts: "A buffalo (35-40 mph) can outrun a horse (25-30 mph) and can flat jump a vertical 6 feet."

Anyone interested should be advised this is a "cash only, no trades" transaction, the ad notes. That'll be $5,950, please.

"If this ad is still showing, the buffalo is still for sale," the woman writes.

Oh, it's still showing. And we'll think about and get back to you.