Back to Winter School

It's the most wonderful time of the year...

At least for parents. Christmas cheer can only go so far with cold winter days before Mom and Dad want nothing more for their precious pride and joy to head back to school.

We're a little bit weird around my house. We heralded the back to school season with naming our educational system Raxacoricofallapatorius University. Why? Because, it's just cool to say.

For those of you who aren't super nerdy, Raxacoricofallapatorius is the planet the Slitheen hail from. Who or what is a Slitheen? Grouchy belching aliens from the British television series Doctor Who. Sure, they are fairly odious, but who doesn't want to a reason to say Raxacoricofallapatorius and make people blink?

The amusement of such a thing could last only so long. Then came the obligatory bribery to do school work. I'm not above offering up a half hour of Halo game-play or a hot cocoa if it ensures completion of school work.

Especially when I do really dumb things like stay up all night watching the Iowa returns. I'm as much a news nerd as a sci-fi nerd. Nothing got done around our house on Wednesday.

Sometimes you just need to roll with the punches, like when your kids walks up looking for a nifty science project. The question, "Will a sonic cane might make for a good science project?" Sonic cane? Yes, please, and make it purple, too!  

Good thing they registered for Sonic Engineering 101 at R. U.

Some ways to encourage kids to get schoolwork done:

1. The promise of "Snow-days". Do the work now or do the work then. "No snow for you!" - Scariest threat to the underage crowd. Up there with no dessert.
2. Offer them a breakfast of pure sugar before sticking them on the school bus. Hey, the candy from the stocking needs eating just as much as that homework needs to go back to school!
3. Bribe them with gourmet cocoa. I'm sure the R.U. won't mind if you drop Jr off with a paper cup of cocoa the size of his head.
4. Video games are your friend. It was too cold earlier this week for kids to play outside anyway. Exercise is for gym class and the electronic babysitter is fairly cheap.
5. Allow them to build you a sonic cane. Wonder what TSA will think on your next flight?

If none of this works, invest in a good set of ear plugs. Then strip their rooms of everything but a mattress. After some yelling and screaming, they'll get to cracking the books and you'll declutter. What a way to take out two pigs with one bird!

Mostly, enjoy your quiet days while all the children are MIA inside the glorious halls of the local schoolhouse.