Zen and the Art of Digging the Moment

“Sometimes it's a little better to travel than to arrive” 
― Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry Into Values

To be perfectly honest, I have not read the novel referenced above, although I do intend to someday. The pile of books on my nightstand and waiting in my kindle archive weigh heavily upon me (in a good way), but there are some books that you just know you will read. I may not even like it, but the idea of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry Into Values has always appealed to me.

I wholeheartedly agree with this quote about travel. I love to travel and the getting there part, the anticipation, is for me the best part. I try to impart this to my kids, that the traveling to our next destination, on a vacation, or just in our daily lives, is really the best part. Although my kids are getting older and have much more tolerance for long road trips on the I-5 to all points northern, they still hold onto the age-old question, "are we there yet?" 

I try to help them appreciate the time in between, the passing landscape that looks like giant lions asleep on the savannah, the walking to school and noticing the new flower blooming, the interesting people we see everywhere, the serendipitous experiences that occur all the time. This is hard to explain to children, who know they have so much time in front of them to do everything they imagine. My son would say that I am being "platitudinous." Seriously. My kids have not yet felt the pressure of time passing that I have begun to notice. And that is good, of course, because they are children and they should not bear that weight. But if I could get them to appreciate a little, tiny bit of the synchronous, organic coolness that is happening all around us, I would be a very happy mama.

This brings me to the path that my son has been on this past school year. He started high school, willingly, and was accepted into a program that he chose. He elected to take art and to play tennis, along with his rigorous academic schedule. I probably do not need to explain to you how extremely proud we are of him. But things have not been all rainbows and aces. He has worked hard, and he had to admit that he probably wouldn't make the tennis team this year. In a school of 4500 students, about 40 kids make the team. The odds were against him, but it was not devastating. He pragmatically decided to try volleyball. We had met the coach before school began and she seemed great. We knew he would have a good experience with her, learning and playing volleyball. He had played summer beach volleyball and liked it. So he switched.

Yesterday, I went to the game they played after school in their old, wood beamed gymnasium. I worked in the snack shack with other parents to raise money to support the team. And I watched some great volleyball. It was not the most skilled volleyball I have ever seen, the players were not the tallest, the facilities were not the nicest I have ever visited. Those things did not matter, however, because it was so amazing to watch my kid and a bunch of other kids, who all seem so nice and perfect in their teenager-y transitional form, be kids on a team. They supported each other, they cheered for each other, they lent each other money to buy snacks, they goofed around together. There was no jeering or booing. Parents, siblings and other students stood on the side lines (we had no bleachers or chairs for our freshman game), and enjoyed the moment. They probably don't know they were having a moment but I am recognizing it for them. My kid did not even get to play! But I loved watching him take part in a community of peers, and when they huddled to shout their team name--you will probably think me completely dorky--I almost cried. My kid would have killed me had he seen this, so I covered it up with nose blowing. 

I hope he can look back at this time and see how the journey from the beginning of his high school experience to this moment, and beyond, was a really good one. He is going to improve, he already has, and he will get his chance to play. He will face obstacles too. But I hope he can revel in the moment when he gets put into the rotation and makes a good play. The time spent earning your spot, the time spent laughing with friends, those are the little moments that make up a life. 

In support and recognition of this we will go to Wilson High School this Saturday morning, next to the gym, and we will ask some great volleyball players to wash our car, and we will give them a tip to add to the collection. I hope some of you will come out and join us. The car wash donation is only $5, but the act of supporting these kids, or any others in any way you can, will help make some moments for them as they travel through life.

“You look at where you're going and where you are and it never makes sense, but then you look back at where you've been and a pattern seems to emerge.” 
― Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry Into Values