Tiger Moms and How To Properly Raise A Child

Fair Oaks Patch invites you and your circle of friends to help build a community of support for mothers and their families right here in Fair Oaks.

Each week in Moms Talk, we’ll look to experts and smart moms to take questions, offer comments and advice and share solutions.

Moms, dads, grandparents and the diverse families who make up our community will have a new resource for questions about local neighborhood schools, the best pediatricians, 24-hour pharmacies and the thousands of other issues that arise while raising children.

Moms Talk will also be the place to drop in for a talk about the latest parenting hot topic. Do you know of local moms raising their children in the Tiger Mother’s way and is it the best way? Where can we get information on local flu shot clinics for children? How do we talk to our children about the Tucson shootings? How can we help our children’s schools weather their budget cutbacks?

So grab a cup of coffee and settle in as we start the conversation today with a discussion about discipline.

When the book, "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother," by Yale law professor Amy Chua came out earlier this year it sparked heated debate in the media over her Tiger Mom tactics. Chua was demonized over her strict parenting style. Chua says she never meant to write a how-to book on parenting; rather the book is a memoir and tells the story of her journey.  Chua describes her initial intent to mother in the classic Chinese “Tiger Mother” fashion, with stern control and vigilance and her comeuppance when faced with serious rebellion from her 13-year-old.

Although some of her rules seem harsh, Chua comes across as a loving mother who truly believed that the “Tiger Mom” tactics she utilized would ensure success and prosperity for her girls. Of course we all want the best for our children. We want them to grow up to be responsible, successful, prosperous, and yes ... happy! But the parenting journey is a winding road with many detours, roadblocks and not many shortcuts. We’re all headed for the same destination, but we’ll arrive by different routes.

How do you instill discipline in your offspring?

• Can it be forced?
• Chua used hyper vigilance.
• Some use outright violence.
• Others model and hope to inspire imitation.
• Some parents believe in specific rules, strict consequences and supervision over all details.
• Others parent with few rules and allow for mistakes along the way.
• Then there’s coaching, begging, nagging and coercion.
• And how might the age of the parent or the order of birth figure in?

If you are interested in taking further part in this weekly ongoing discussion or would like to become a member of Fair Oaks Patch's Moms Council, leave us a comment or email Joshua Staab at joshua.staab@patch.com. We are very interested in hearing from you!