Lightworkers Blog My Imaginary Husband

Andre Rieu is my imaginary husband. 

When I am not being one of the world’s most notable psychics and teachers of intuition (wink wink), my day job, so to speak, is working with the elderly.  Most are on hospice comfort care.  Most have had strokes.  Some can still talk, others can’t talk with words anymore but we communicate just fine in other ways.  All have retained special personality traits they have held on tightly to their whole lives.  For instance, one woman insists on seeing me to the door every time I leave.  I always say “no don’t get up” and she always say’s “but I still can”!

An elder I see one day a week is a lover of classical music and has lots of music DVD’s.  Each day I am scheduled to arrive she neatly lays her ‘concert movies’ out on her freshly made bed so I will be able to choose one to watch during our visit.  I always choose the Dutch conductor and violinist Andre Rieu.

One day, as we helped Andre conduct a particularly snappy tune I declared, “Andre Rieu is my imaginary husband”!  My client laughed and said “Mine too!”  I told her she couldn’t have him because I had already claimed him as my own and then she suggested we share him.  “Absolutely NOT” I said, “That would break the imaginary rules!  There are over 50 people in that orchestra and you can choose someone else”.   She was not happy about it but I held firm.  It took several minutes until she eventually settled on a percussionist that played a nice snare, and after she named him Jerry we continued with our imaginary conducting.

I was scheduled with another elder in the same house and asked her if I could have Lilly (not her real name) come join us while I curled her hair.  My client got up and opened the French doors to her room to allow for Lilly’s wheelchair.   Lilly is living with a stroke and can only be understood if she creates a mammoth amount of concentration to form the words in her mind and then consciously make her muscles move the right way in her throat and around her mouth then, with luck and a full breath of air understandable words may come out.  

There are many kinds of stroke, and just to be clear I am not a doctor, but most will challenge one side or the other of the body and speech always seems to take a hit.  What complicates matters is if there is any kind of excitement, or pain, confusion or frustration the chances of understanding their needs through words diminish greatly.  This increases the patients’ frustration even more.  (To read more about this condition I highly recommend the book MY STROKE OF INSIGHT by Jill Bolte Taylor.  She is a great teacher and taught me so much about how to respect and help someone challenged by stroke).

Once Lilly and her chair was in the room and settled I explained to her that I had chosen Andre Rieu as my imaginary husband and Nancy (not her real name) had chosen Jerry the snare man to be hers. We both invited her to choose someone from the orchestra to be her imaginary husband.  She got very tense and her mood changed quickly to frustration. 

By the time I turned her wheelchair around and sat at the end of Nancy’s bed so I could look her in the eye her muscles were spasming.  I asked her to take a deep breath.  She mumbled then shouted inaudibly. I said a little louder to hold her attention,” Lilly, look me and tell me if you are in any pain.  Does any part of your body hurt”?  She stared at me and I could see the sheer will of action in the way of awkward mouth movements, and finally she blurted a loud “NO”. “Lilly” I continued, “Do you need to use the rest room”?  Again, she took a deep breath and looked straight into my eyes and yelled “NO”.   

“Whew, good” I said, “looks like we have plenty of time to relax and catch our breath. Lilly, I know your words sound right to your ears but in reality they don’t sound right to our ears”.  We smiled at each other, held hands, and after a minute I asked, “Are you ready to talk now”?  She nodded, and with the same amount of dedication she gave to the first two questions she answered in a loud, drawling, elongated and slowly deliberate A N D R E ‘

And I snapped back “NO”!

Debra Zachau is a person anchored in this world to be of service for those who are searching for their own truth and peace. Every Thursday for the month of July she will host group and individual readings in Oceanside. Group readings start at 2:22 (yes you read that right) and again at 5:55 (wink) Class will run a couple of hours and the fee is $25.00. Please call directly to hold your spot and get the Oceanside address.  Debra wants to make sure everyone gets a reading. 760-622-1881  http://growyourlight.com/