Reflections of 9/11

It was my day off for the week.

Had picked up an overtime shift, so it was going to be my one day of the week to relax and take it easy.

Was planning to go to the LA County Fair. Watch the horses run. Hopefully pick some winners.

Then I woke up about 8:30 a.m. to Ralph Garman and morning show producer Lightning on my clock radio.

They weren’t supposed to be on. Not talking. Not live. KROQ’s morning show was on vacation. Replays of their earlier comedy bits were supposed to be playing. Some music. Not them taking. Not the amount they were.

Something was wrong. It had to be.

Woke up enough to realize something most definitely was wrong. Some sort of an attack. They were taking calls and there were lots of angry folks on the line.

Reached over and turned on the small TV with the rabbit ears antenna that we had in our room. Just after the towers came down.

That woke us up.

Hurried and got dressed. Called in to work to ask if I was needed. Biggest story of my generation, so probably could use a few extra hands at the newspaper office, right?

Nope. Didn’t need me. Left on the bench.

Then the closures came. And not just the big ones like the fairgrounds. But every place was closing up shop for the day. Couldn’t even go to the video store to rent something – they closed up shop, too. We couldn’t afford cable at that point, so all we had was the LA stations.

Even for a journalist, it’s a little maddening to see nothing but news all the time. Even with an event as big as this.

So, going slightly mad, I got out of the house and tried to find something open. Anything.

I ended up at a club where my brother-in-law worked as security. They were open. And even with music going in the background, the TV was on coverage. There was nothing else.

I’m not proud.

I sat there for a couple of hours, trying – in vain – to not be bitter about being left on the bench. Trying not to let it get me down. It turned out to be an impossible task.

And it didn’t help that on the way to work the next day, I made that trip to the fair to watch and bet on a race or two before starting my shift, only to have everything shut down because some nut called in a bomb threat.

In the nearly 10 years since, I can look back with some fondness at how unique my experience on Sept. 11, 2001 might have been. Since then, we’ve actually been out of state for two anniversaries (which meant flying in the days just before and after). Including a trip to New York City on the fourth anniversary, my one and only trip to the city.

It was a bit surreal. We were in town two days before, and got to experience the day to day life of walking the streets of downtown Manhattan, seeing the hustle and bustle that we equate with New York.

But on the day itself, everything seemed more subdued. There were fewer people on the sidewalks. It was quieter. And the next day, it was back to being “New York.”

This year, on the tenth anniversary, there will be memorials and remembrances. My day will be spent remembering two victims – Ace Bailey and Mark Bavis -- among many like-minded people – at Staples Center for the LA Kings’ Hockey Fest.

It may not be the most somber occasion, but it will be a chance to enjoy a day while also remembering that day 10 years ago.

Because that’s the only way we can truly heal in life. We never forget, but we also don’t stop living.