They Know It's Fake, Right?

So, sometime last week Lou Dobbs and his friends on Fox came out abashing at the upcoming animated film "The Lorax" for its evil, liberal ways.

This comes on the heels of another Fox News host bashing "The Muppets" for portraying an oil company executive as evil.

Um ... they're basically cartoons, right? Fiction? Not real? (And, haven't oil barons been stock bad guys in comedies, like, forever? Especially in cartoons?)

I get it. They're afraid that the children will be indoctrinated in ideas that would move away from their message and toward the damn hippies in the Occupy movement.

Again: They're cartoons. For children. Who, if they pick up the message -- and that's a pretty big if there -- aren't going out to hold signs for the 99 percent unless their parents hand it to them. And then they really don't know why they're holding the sign other than mommy or daddy told them to.

You see, I've become a pretty good authority in children's programming. My young son has watched a good deal of Disney Channel and Nick Jr. through the years, and I've been right there with him while he does it. And every one of those shows has something for the children to learn.

Looking at some of my son's favorites, I can totally see how the folks at Fox can attack each of them.

• Sesame Street and Elmo teach the basics. But Elmo loves hugs ... maybe someone should put a stop to all that free love.
• Little Einsteins explores the worlds of art and music. Need to stop that right now because someone may become a debaucherous rock star leading a life of unprotected sex and drugs.
• There's everyone's favorite explorer, Dora. Is she speaking *gasp* Spanish?! It's going to make them sympathetic to all those illegals. Someone should check her immigration status.
• Then there's his new favorite, Octonauts. The show features animals exploring and protecting the ocean, learning, literally, about all the fish in the sea. Ohmigawd, they're teaching kids to join Greenpeace!
• And, lastly, there's Team Umizoomi. The show features lessons in math, pattern recognition and shapes. Man, that's show's going for broke ... they're trying to get our kids to learn enough to go to college. The snobbery, eh, Mr. Santorum?

My wonderment here is what do they want the kids to watch? Shows that promote the American ideal, like "24" did?

(And, for the record, I loved that show. When it was good -- which was more often than not -- it was amazing. And I felt the same about the people who protested it as I do about the Fox folks: It's TV. It's fiction. No one said you had to watch it. I wouldn't let my son watch it, though.)

It's all entertainment folks. Kids will get what they want to get out of it. Some laughs. A few catch phrases. Maybe a lesson ... maybe not.

Indoctrination starts in the home. Just as I've seen children holding Occupy signs, I've seen them walking with anti-abortion signs. Or sitting with their Girl Scout troops (more on that one soon enough).

We have one in our house: Go Kings Go!