Riverside Police Write Poetic Warning To Catch Mail Thief

RIVERSIDE, CA — Riverside police sought the public's help in nabbing a suspected serial mail thief Sunday — in the form of poetry. The warning, written on the department's social media accounts, was a parody of Christmas Poem "Twas the Night Before Christmas."

The department released security video footage of Ryan William Helm, suspected of committing repetitive mail theft, identity theft and fraud. Helm is suspected of hitting mailboxes in Riverside, Moreno Valley and the Temecula areas.

A video by the Economic Crimes Unit showed surveillance video of Helm, who is 35 and was described as 6 feet tall, 230 pounds and bald with blue eyes.

Anyone with information about the suspect was asked to call Detective Brian Money at 951- 353-7118.

The security footage was accompanied by cheerful holiday music, a crackling fireplace and the Christmas poem dubbed "A Christmas Story From Our Economic Crimes Unit."

And it appears someone within the department is quite the poet. The poem, snarkily penned, went as follows:

"'Twas the week before Christmas
and all through our city blocks,
a habitual thief is out creeping,
stealing from your mailbox.

Then off to the store he goes,
paying with someone else’s account,
never spending his own dough,
just using the five finger discount.

He’s been caught and arrested
too many times to say,
then released on probation
to steal again yet another day.

Right now he’s got warrants,
four to be exact,
but we like him for similar crimes,
several as a matter of fact.

He’s hitting a certain neighborhood recently
where it’s called Mission Grove,
we don’t have a description of his vehicle,
but we’re confident he drove.

He’s a noticeable fella,
6 foot tall, 230 and bald,
if you see him lurking around your mailbox,
it’s the police who should be called.

On Santa’s naughty list he shall remain,
whether he likes it or not,
and we hope his gifts arrive before Christmas...
THREE HOTS AND A COT!"

To view the video and post on Facebook, visit the Riverside Police Department's page.