Last Night I Went To A Bar For A WEHO Story Focused on Winners...

I wondered how I could muster the courage to write a story for PATCH I went to cover in a bar last night, I barely had covered- only as far as one category of bar of an entire series of awards at an event for Best of WEHO, Fall 2018, and now, link it to mass murder at a bar called Borderline in Thousand Oaks, that I heard first thing this morning had been committed, allegedly by a Marine veteran?

In a town, in a county, in a state and a country defined by borders, how could I not connect the dots as my own pov for PATCH? I could not.

PLEASE KEEP IN MIND THE CELEBRATORY EVENT I WAS COVERING OCCURRED VIRTUALLY AT THE SAME TIME AS THE TRAGIC SHOOTINGS IN A NEARBY COUNTY, BOTH IN CA...THE PEOPLE I MET ARE NOT THE ONES WHO CHOSE TO BE LINKED TO THIS MAYHEM...NONE OF US HAD ANY IDEA WHAT WAS HAPPENING SIMULTANEOUSLY...I HAVE MADE THIS CHOICE AND HAVE DONE SO AS MY OWN BEST EFFORTS AND INTENTIONS...

I was on my way to The Den, a bar, where I never had been- I've always disliked bars, not my strong suit as any version of man or person who goes for a pick-me-up or pick-up...even when being hit upon, I was my own traffic jam collision- totaled with barely more than a sip of anything. Before I had left home, I heard about a comedian, who told a joke on a late night show, about a political candidate who wears an eye patch, and those who thought the joke was inappropriate, not befitting of a soldier, who had lost his sight in one eye, in service of his country, who, first had been reported, an Ex-Marine, who since, I've heard, is an Ex-Navy Seal. Had this joke done more harm than good, or vice versa? You decide:

An ex-Navy SEAL has been elected to the U.S. House three days after "Saturday Night Live" mocked the eye patch he wears because he was badly wounded in combat.
Republican Dan Crenshaw defeated Democrat Todd Litton on Tuesday to represent a vacant Houston-area district.
Crenshaw lost his right eye in a battlefield explosion. Comic Pete Davidson joked on Saturday that his eye patch made him look like a "hit man in a porno movie," The joke drew widespread condemnation and attention to Crenshaw's campaign.
Crenshaw tweeted Sunday that he hoped SNL "recognizes that vets don't deserve to see their wounds used as punchlines for bad jokes." https://www.thenewstribune.com...

Life is complicated, as am I...so please, follow me on the road to getting this story, if you'd like...

When I was a kid, one Christmas, I had been stumped on what to give my father for Christmas, which for many Jewish kids growing up in NYC was a garden variety, once a year problem, as every Jewish New Yorker, who I knew, celebrated Christmas as a seasonal American holiday, and often because the head of our households, were such maverick fathers, they were why families lived in New York to begin with. They were like the first wave of warriors on a battlefield that barged through barriers and took Manhattan by storm- tough guys who seemed so self-sufficient, how could a son even succeed with one measly mission of finding a present for Christmas? I wasn't the only one who felt doomed from the start.

I gave it my all, then suddenly...EPIPHANY! (Like a Supremes' symphony sung by only one diva.)

"Wow- I'll give him my G.I. Joe doll- he was in the army- and if I know it, he must have said it to me, at least once- that's pride enough for me."

All I remember after Christmas was a step-brother like a hangover as he kept making fun of me...all the way 'til New Year's eve and beyond. It had something to do with Joe being battered and bruised- it's not like I had pretended it was a new doll- I figured that part had been obvious. "So what if the head kept falling off? It was the thought that counts," at least that's what I thought. I didn't think about the broader issues that pertain to playing with a doll named G.I. Joe...nor did I even think about a realm that I never had considered...a real G.I. Joe and what life is like for him when re-entering the world as a civilian...there wasn't even a term called Post-Traumatic Stress, for sure not for a soldier after being so battered as a human being.

What does become of a man or a woman, who is big and strong but always gets bruised as human...how do big and strong people fit into the world as its own playing field...not for battle per se... when the world only wants to see people based on physical attributes?

All I know is whatever pound of weak kneed human, I am not a wuss nor a weak link to anyone else.

I had just ordered a drink, like a bar-newbie, as I asked the bartender if she would recommend the house pinot noir, and I thought, "Dumb question," out loud. As I perused the free magazine on the counter, unlike the seemingly same gratis appetizers, the bartender advised me to ask permission before assuming I was part of someone else's tab. I wasn't hungry anyway, just a bit anxious...far beneath the standard that would require aspirin or smelling salts.

The first guy who slid past me to order a drink, I asked, how had he been prompted to attend this event, and he said, he owned a bar. I asked, "Are you a nominee?" He replied what sounded like "Winner." There was basic bar ambience and I thought- is it me, or should he have more glee to his voice, he seemed so low key for a winner, it made me feel like somehow I was a loser and had misunderstood. It seemed like destiny that he was the co-owner of The Bayou, Wehoville's pick as BEST DIVE BAR. I had just found it hard to focus on his entry in the Wehoville guide, since it was the one category on the flip side- of the same double whammy page with the conspicuous big strong and muscled guy...the mascot model for BEST GO GO DANCER BAR.

I retreated to my metaphorical safe place, and asked, The Bayou's, Graham Northwood, if the glass I had been poured was half full or half empty? He said, half full for sure, but not over full...a key distinction from someone who owns a bar and in whose interest it is not to exaggerate the meaning of half nor full, in what gets served as a glass of pinot, day or night, grigio or noir, even brandy, especially, brandy. Northwood eyed the glass up and down and pointed out how it gets narrower towards the bottom. That's existentialism to which I can make a toast.

Almost as if taking his place, as the natural reflex of an opening at the counter of a popular bar, though this one was not so crowded, and a woman named Madonna stepped up by her own volition, more than by submission to the powers that be...for anyone who's been on a jammed packed subway, as in every NYC subway at rush hour...you get moved into an opening as if by gravitational force.

Madonna Louise Cacciatore is the newly named, Executive Director of Christopher Street West / LA Pride, and is the link for me between the Madonna of nativity and bustier...she had been named or Christened, before the superstar musical diva, Madonna, had been given the same such name, a seeming tradition, about which I had been unaware, and once again, had made the wrong assumption. One mustn't err in making false assumptions about Madonna's or Assumptions in a faith that takes both quite seriously, some Catholics, even as dogma. No disrespect, I guarantee... but mea culpa any way, seems in order, at the very least.

Madonna and her wife, Robin, assured me these were glasses at least half full...they inspired me always to see the picture in full, "The way I live my life," said Madonna, I can not say for sure, if she was speaking for them both.

For sure, it was Madonna who gave me the tip about a real speakeasy in Hollywood, that was a secret until I mentioned the name of a former speakeasy in Greenwich Village- her eyes seemed to open like I had said a secret password, a la, whatever that word was in all those toga clad Alladin movies when genies were not like Barbara Eden...I think the command words were, "Open- says me!" or else, it was "Sesame" ..."Street" must have been implied, as it was not yet built.

Congratulations to the winners of Wehoville's Best of WEHO, Fall 2018, for a complete list, here's a link: https://issuu.com/whmc/docs/wh...

My heartfelt condolences for families of victims, my heartfelt prayers for survivors, and their families, and my full support and gratitude to emergency crews, who are there, wherever tragedy occurs...they are heroes without borders, this time in Thousand Oaks, CA.