The Freelance Retort: Not January's Fault

The Freelance Retort by Brian Moloney

January can’t help but feel a bit schizophrenic.

There are those who look upon January as a brave white knight, riding into town to save the day.

Others—not saying who—look upon January as a bad night on the town, capped off by a stepped in pile of horse poop, left behind by the mounted policeman who recently reminded you that pants are a required wardrobe accessory while strolling down Main Street, even if it is after midnight.

So January doesn’t really know what to think.

Adulation here….

Disdain there….

60 degrees here….

6 degrees there….

Yeah.

So what’s a month to do…especially the first month of every year?

I had heard rumors that January was lobbying hard with April to swap places, just on a trial basis—or at least that’s what January wanted April to think.

Everyone loves April, but it can be a little schizophrenic in its own right…sometimes even more extreme than January.

80 degrees here….

28 degrees there….

Beach Day today….

Snow shoveling tomorrow….

Yet no one ever criticizes April; no…not April. April comes along with spring and everyone loves spring.

So people look the other way and let April slide, blaming all the inconsistencies on the quirky weather when things gets a little whacky.

Like January has control over its weather?

Do you think January likes being cold and bleak?

No...but that’s just how it was raised.

And January hears all the whispers…notices the abruptly halted conversations whenever it walks into the coffee room….

For the rest of the story, or to just kill a couple of more minutes while you’re waiting for your toes to thaw...Please Click Here....

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