“Ask for Referrals, That May Be a Mistake”

 I recently went to a networking event. There was an opportunity to get up, tell about what you do and then ask for referrals. As it happened I was the last person to stand up and do my thing. 

When I stood up, I shared about what I did for a living, but told everyone there, I didn’t feel right about asking for referrals, as I hadn’t earned their trust, but wanted to make arrangements with as many of them as I could so that I could get to know each person and have them get to know me as well. 

When the meeting broke up there was an opportunity to do some mingling or networking. There was a line of folks that wanted speak to me and set up lunch dates. Each person commented how much they appreciated my not asking for referrals and that I felt I hadn’t earned that right to receive any referrals. I set up 4 lunch dates and have since interacted with a dozen folks, that may eventually be referral partners. 

I have always viewed referrals as it takes tremendous courage to give my name to someone, so I make sure that referral is being precious and not mishandled.