Fathers can have a great impact on their children

Do you remember the advice your father gave to you as a child? Here are a few examples from Bruce Lansky, author of FATHERLY WIT AND WISDOM:

*So you think you’re smart, do you?

*I may not be a rocket scientist, but I am your father.

*Algebra doesn’t have to make sense.

*I couldn’t afford college so I went to the School of Hard Knocks. And I go my degree in Bumps and Bruises.

*Finish school or you’ll wind up digging ditches like your brother.

The following advice will help fathers make a larger contribution to their child’s success in school:

First, recognize the value of a father’s involvement in education. The National Center for Education Statistics in Washington, D.C. reported the following about fathers and education:

*involved fathers are more likely to have visited a library, museum or historical site with their children

*involved fathers are more likely to have high educational expectations for their children

*the children of involved fathers are more likely to get A’s on their report cards

According to John Rosemond, author of WHY FATHERS COUNT, “When fathers function as active parents their children tend to be more self-confident. They are more adaptable, outgoing, and independent. They possess better social skills, exhibit fewer behavior problems, and do better in school. As teens, these kids are less likely to have problems with sex, drugs, or alcohol than children whose dads sit on the sidelines.”

Second, be involved with your child’s education without leaving the comfort of home. Many fathers work long hours and would prefer to spend time at home helping their children. Roberta Kirshbaum, author of PARENT POWER offers fathers the following suggestions:

*make sure your child starts out each school day from a strong position by evaluating basic needs- is your child getting enough rest? Does your child have comfortable clothes? Does your child have a healthy diet?

*send educational websites of possible interest to your child’s school- this is a way to encourage enrichment activities in the classroom as well as a way to get the teacher to think of you as an individual.

*make a family calendar- be sure to mark school events on it. The calendar works best if you try to attend as many extracurricular events as possible.

*help with your child’s homework- this shows her it is important. But don’t do your child’s homework for her.

Third, listen carefully to your child. Take the time to listen to your child before beginning another lecture. Active listening involves asking clarifying questions and getting as many facts as possible. Active listening also involves giving your full attention to the conversation- put the computer away, turn off the television set, and answer your cell phone calls later. Fathers can show their interest and love through daily active listening.

The quality of a father can be seen in the goals, dreams, and aspirations he sets not only for himself, but for his family.