STOP Handing out FORGIVENESS For FREE!

Forgiveness. There are two very distinct views on forgiveness. One view is very biblical in nature. Matthew 6:14 encourages us to forgive others their trespasses as God will forgive us. I get that. It makes sense. 

The other view of forgiveness is something I hear all the time. It is a quote from United States Navy Rear Admiral Grace Hopper who is credited with creating the phrase: "It is better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission".

These two views on forgiveness are in stark contrast to one another. The Book of Matthew is a more passive, repentant view of forgiveness. Admiral Hopper's view places asking forgiveness as an after-thought to an action. Begging forgiveness versus asking permission is a bold and daring thing to do. It is exactly the type of action that garners the most rewards and respect and is the mark of leadership. What Admiral Hopper is saying is you have to take a chance, go with your gut, bet the house and if it doesn't work out, THEN, you beg for forgiveness. 

I take issue with people who provide forgiveness without having the offender ASK for forgiveness. I accept that you may have been wronged and you are putting your trust in a Higher Power and you therefore grant forgiveness, even without being asked. But providing forgiveness to those who do not seek it first does nothing to promote the sentiment of what Matthew wrote. If your are wronged and the offender DID NOT KNOW you were being wronged, forgive the ignorance of the transgression. Only when the offender understands the transgression can the full effect of forgiveness come into play. If I wrong you and did not know it, you should advise me of my transgression so I may understand the error of my ways so that I may not offend another. Through your forgiveness, I am redeemed, but not just redeemed; I have gained the knowledge and a new perspective on how my actions affect others. This is about teaching someone who did not know and providing a path for them to redeem their actions. But if we simply offer blanket forgiveness, what are we teaching? We are giving the world carte blanche to run over us and feign ignorance as we accept an insincere apology. 

Most of the time we do what Admiral Hopper suggests doing; Do the deed, get the job done and if there is an opps! moment, ask forgiveness and move on to the next thing. Every single one of us does this in some form or another. Ever drove more than 55 MPH on I-285? Sure, everyone does it, but you are taking a chance that you will not get caught and if you do, you will ask for forgiveness because I have yet to find a law enforcement officer who will GIVE me PERMISSION to do 80 MPH on I-285!  The courts do not give out permission slips; they issue fines, not forgiveness. But we do it anyway. Why? We know the law, we see the signs, we signed our license and yet we go out and speed anyway. We take the chance and we accept the consequences and most of the time, nothing happens. We beat the system.

Successful people take chances to do something others would normally seek permission to do. I have never read a successful business plan and I've read hundreds of business plans. The reason why I have never read a successful business plan is because people who are successful in business are driven to succeed, so they take a chance without asking anyone to review, look over this or that or approve their decision to bet the farm and the cows on their brash plan to take over the world. They have business plans, but they are going to do what they do regardless of what anyone thinks about their plans. They know it is better to BEG FOR FORGIVENESS, because you will likely never be given permission.

Stop giving blanket forgiveness. Let transgressors seek forgiveness. This is not contrary to God's teachings, this is God's teachings. We must all ask for forgiveness. Stop pushing your work of teaching off on God. Jesus didn't walk past the money changers in the temple and simply say under His breath, "Father, do you see what these people are doing?" No, He ran them out! That wasn't passive. That was aggressive and forceful and it got the job done. Go get the job done! And stop going so fast on I-285...