What Matters in Life?

By: Kenneth Stepp

Having a broad range of interests in my life. I have been blessed to know so many types of people. Most are easy enough to read. Some are almost impossible. Welcome to reality.  There are many levels, or categories that matter to us. Do you have a list? I do. Although I have never physically created one. It does exist. My kids, the people not in my family I care deeply for, helping the helpless, and changing everything for the good that is in my orbit. I have been accused of having too much passion in these areas. I’ll admit my guilt, without apology, up front.

Most of us, like me, have that list. The list is readily available, even though we may have never thought about having one at all. When asked, we rattle it off as if we memorized it years ago. I have to reference the things that matter most to me when “life happens”. These are events we must endure. Call it the toll for being on the road of life. My mom is almost 87 years old. Her days of raising kids have long been gone. But when something happens to any of her kids, she’s a momma bear all over again. I spoke with her yesterday about my diagnosis and impending hospital visit. Mom is always on my side. I am on her list. It felt nice to speak to someone who I am important to. Like I said. Everyone has a list. Even the narcissist. Of course….. That’s an odd looking list. Yet still, a list. Let’s not judge all the narcissists out there. We all have a measure of it. We share that DNA.

Have you ever boiled it all the way down. I’m in the process of doing that now. I believe this brain tumor is helping me with that. My motto is one I coined myself. You can read it on the first page of my nonprofit’s website. “Welcome to American Angel Works. Where everyone is as important as anyone”. I find myself repeating that over in my mind when dealing with a difficult person. It gave me a great perspective on whatever my outcome will be when I go in for more tests. If I had to choose someone to have an aggressive brain tumor. I would probably choose me. No one depends on me, I’m alone, and I do not fear death in the least. I would have to pick me. My logical side would force that. “Why me”? has never popped into my head. I’m not saying I wouldn’t be missed. I have closer friends than most.

The way we look at ourselves and our experiences depends so much on how logical we are, how it relates to us and those we love, and our own perspective on the matter. Truth is in fact subject to who is receiving it and in what context. This is how we develop what matters most to us.

“Perspective is as simple as answering this question: If I had 5 months to live would I experience this problem differently?” ― Shannon L. Alder

Perspective gives us a path to truth. One we need. If we can gather all the details, see things through a view that is not blinded by what is best for “us”, but simply, what is best. I believe we can then and only then find what really matters. Does it have to matter to us? It should. To me, the greater good is so important. My list still exists. It really is more about me than I care to admit. We can only work on what matters in life through our own lives. And the best gift we can give ourselves is to learn how to find pleasure in doing the right things. Then we will live a wonderful life.

www.stepplife.com

Founder, American Angel Works