After Tragedy, Arlington Heights Community Comes Together to Honor Domestic Violence Victims

ARLINGTON HEIGHTS, IL —When Arlington Heights resident Roxana Abrudan was murdered by her estranged husband in 2014, the community reacted with a mixture of sadness and shock that domestic violence could occur in their tight-knit community.

To that end, several Arlington Heights organizations are coming together this Sunday to host a community candlelight vigil at 6:30 p.m. at North School Park. "Shine the Light: A Candlelight Vigil for Those Affected by Family Violence" is organized by St. James Parish, Our Lady of the Wayside, St. Edna Catholic Church, Daily Herald Media Group, Northwest Community Healthcare and WINGS (Women in Need Growing Stronger).

The groups first held a candlelight vigil in 2015, and drew about 150 people, about one year after Abrudan's murder.

Abrudan, 36, was in hiding just a few months after she married Cristian Loga-Negru, 38. Abrudan obtained an order of protection and was living at the Mount Pleasant, Wisconsin home of a friend. Negru tracked her down and used a hatchet “to inflict the maximum amount of pain, terror and mutilation.” Negru was covered in his wife's blood when police found him.

Negru was found guilty of the murder this past summer. He will be sentenced next month.

Three years before Abrudan's death, the Rev. Bill Zavaski, the former pastor of St. James, invited the Rev. Charles Dahm to speak to parishioners at St. James weekend masses about domestic violence.

After he spoke, Zavaski received calls from parish members who asked him why he invited Dahm to the church, saying that domestic violence doesn't happen in Arlington Heights, Patricia Kellen, a member of St. James, told Patch.

In response, a group of parishioners at St. James decided to form Stepping Stones, the St. James domestic violence ministry. The group contacted other Arlington Heights churches to put together the "Shine The Light" vigil for all members of the Arlington Heights community.

"The goals were to raise awareness — yes, it's happening here in Arlington Heights — and to stand in solidarity with those caught in the cycle of violence," Kellen said to Patch. "We wanted to bring the issue to light as we are aware that abuse thrives in silence.”

Patch talked to Arlington Heights Police Deputy Chief Nicholas Pecorca who gave us some statistics on domestic violence in Arlington Heights:

• Domestic Battery Cases (physical assault occurred and an arrest was made): 2014 had 102 cases, 2015 had 103 cases, and as of September 2016, there have been 67 cases.
• Domestic Trouble Cases (arguing, no physical contact, no arrests were made): 2014 had 564 cases, 2015 had 557 cases, and as of September 2016, there have been 413 cases.
• Violation of Order of Protection Cases (someone violates an order of protection): 2014 had 21 cases, 2015 had 20 cases, and as of September 2016, there have been 15 cases.

"A lot of times people don't publicize what happens behind closed doors," Pecorca said. "It's not something that's on the front page of the town paper."

This year's vigil will feature a variety of speakers, including Mayor Tom Hayes, Anna Vann of WINGS, Brendan Yukins of Rape Victim Advocates, a representative from Northwest Center Against Sexual Assault, and a domestic violence survivor who refers to herself as a "victor" instead of a "victim."

Patch talked to registered nurse Don Houchins, the Executive Director of Women's and Children's Services at Northwest Community Healthcare. Houchins is also on the board of directors of WINGS.

At Northwest Community Healthcare, they screen every patient for signs of domestic abuse and violence. Sometimes, he said, patients present very obvious signs, like knuckle marks, bruises or scratches. Other times, patients are quieter about what's happening to them.

Houchins and his staff always ask the same question to patients: Do you feel safe at home?

Houchins told Patch that one-in-15 Illinois children will witness or be a part of domestic violence. In 2014, there were 84 deaths in Illinois due to domestic violence — 15 of these were children.

"It's a very complicated situation," Houchins said, who believes these statistics are widely underreported.

Houchins first works to provide immediate protection for those in danger. There are domestic violence safe houses as well as general housing available.

WINGS is the largest domestic violence housing provider in Illinois. They have a safe house in Rolling Meadows, with 45 beds and 24-hour, 7-days-a-week staffing. They provide victims with food, clothes and whatever else they need. Because they're always full, WINGS just opened a second safe house in Chicago.

Rebecca Darr, the CEO of WINGS, told Patch they see three times as many kids as they do adults every year.

The foundation offers free counseling and outreach services. They also create a safety plan for victims who need it, where they set up housing for the victim, provide them with economic support and sometimes job training.

Darr told Patch that the most dangerous time for a victim is when they decide they're going to leave their abuser. Darr said the abuser will often use tactics such as telling the victim they love them and they'll never do it again, or go the opposite way and threaten the victim or their children.

"Domestic violence is about power and control," Darr said.

WINGS focuses on empowering women and providing them with skills and benefits that the victim needs to feel independent and unshackled from their abuser.

Darr touched on the murder of Abrudan, and also of former Arlington Heights resident Cindy Bischof, a successful real estate agent. Bischof was shot by her ex-boyfriend, who repeatedly violated his order of protection, outside her workplace in Elmhurst in 2008.

Bischof's death led to the "Cindy Bischof Law" passed in 2009, which allows a judge to order a defendant charged with or convicted of a violation of an order of protection to wear a GPS monitoring device.

"For every one that we lose, there are thousands that we're saving," Darr told Patch.

Kristin Eby, the victim services coordinator at the Arlington Heights Police Department for the past 13 years, works primarily with victims of domestic violence and supports them through the court process. She told Patch that there's a fair share of mental illness or substance-abuse problems in many domestic violence cases.

"They might be arrested for domestic battery, but there's a lot of underlying issues," Eby said.

Eby said one of the biggest things people can do to deter domestic violence is show a community that problems like these exist.

"To turn a blind eye to it is not the answer," Eby said. "Domestic violence is everywhere. It's in great neighborhoods, it's in poor neighborhoods."

Things like domestic violence vigils, such as the one in Arlington Heights, as well as October's Domestic Violence Awareness Month, are ways to shed light on situations that are often turned a blind eye to, Houchins told Patch.

At the vigil, there will be red, human-shaped silhouettes set up that each tell the story of a victim who died at the hands of their abuser, called Silent Witnesses. Abrudan will be honored as one of the eight silent witnesses. At the end of the vigil, attendees will be asked to place their candle at the feet of one of the Silent Witness Silhouettes on display.

Two pre-vigil events will also be held that day. At 5 p.m., a Catholic mass will take place at St. James where pastors from the three Catholic Churches of Arlington Heights will preside. At 6 p.m., there will be a procession, led by bagpiper J. Kevin Chapman. Participants will leave St. James and walk to North School Park, carrying several of the Silent Witness Silhouettes to the site.

"We have a community of 75,000 residents," Pecorca told Patch. "It'd be nice to say that everyone gets along, but we don't live in a perfect world yet."

Photo courtesy of Lindsay Shaver/Flickr