Belonging is critical coping skill for youth

Building Life by Belonging

by Nancy Lincoln Reynolds

“Belonging is an essential aspect of human growth and critical to building lives of well-being and happiness. In Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, it is the third developmental challenge after basic physical survival and security needs are met. Having people with whom we feel we belong, who love and accept us, is the catalyst to our feelings of self-worth and value.

Some mental health professionals suggest that anxiety, depression and loneliness are direct results of the lack of belonging, of feeling like an outsider. This may be especially true of our youth whose adolescent years are inherently about discovering who they are and where they belong.

Social psychologist, Gregory Walton, warns that not feeling like one belongs anywhere may also cause us to be less motivated and less able to cope with obstacles and stress in life. When absent in the early years of life, there may be difficulty in establishing the very coping skills one needs to belong: forming and maintaining close relationships.

Recent research studies in our area propose that our youth need more coping and resilience skills in order to navigate the complicated and challenging task of growing up. Building Life is working closely with the YSA of AACPS in addressing these concerns and planning avenues of education, intervention and prevention to help provide them.

“Belonging” is the first focus of a new project, Parenting for a Different World, designed to help all of us create and support good foundations for coping and being resilient in the face of inevitable difficulties in our living. Belonging needs can be fulfilled by one person or many. It may be provided in families, schools, teams and other aspects of community such as faith-based and service organizations. Wherever it emerges, it is helpful to gratefully acknowledge and name the source(s).

The Belonging Tree tribute offers just such an opportunity. Sunday, March 8 at 4:00, the Chesapeake Arts Center hosts the Broadneck High School’s production of Kiss Me Kate, and makes a tribute to Chris Wood, Severna Park coach and friend to so many, whose life bore witness to the importance of Belonging. A Belonging Tree has been designed by artist, Kate Brooks, and sits in the lobby of the CAC with a tribute from his wife, Lisa, and their four children. Participants are invited to make tributes of their own to others who have offered them that important sense of belonging and, so, made a difference in their lives.

The Belonging Tree will be a virtual presence and continue to take tributes on websites following this event. For more information go to YSA’s website, www.achoicetolive.org or Building Life, www.buildinglife.net.

Please join us Sunday:

Chesapeake Arts Center

194 Hammonds Lane

Brooklyn Park, MD

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