How to Celebrate Mother's Day with Aging Loved Ones

According to the Eldercare Workforce Alliance, more than 35 million Americans are over age 65, and about 90 percent of them suffer from at least one chronic condition. This leaves many families facing challenges such as how to plan Mother’s Day events or celebrations that are enjoyable for everyone, including those who may not be able to participate like they used to.

The good news is there are plenty of enjoyable activities to do on Mother’s Day with your mother or grandmother, even as she enters into later stages of aging, requires in-home care or has a health condition such as Alzheimer’s disease or dementia.

Time is a gift in and of itself. Most older adults would rather spend time with you than receive physical gifts. In a survey conducted by the Health and Retirement Study in 2010, 60 percent of people aged 60 or older said they had more things than they need. Instead of a gift, consider spending the day doing something meaningful together, such as going through photo albums or cooking a meal. Or help your loved one by offering to do spring cleaning or chores around the house. To make it more of a gift, you could create a gift certificate for her to redeem in the future.

If your loved one is experiencing normal aging or some depression associated with aging, she will likely appreciate a day of pampering. Treat her to a spa day or take her to get a manicure or her hair done. A colorful bouquet of flowers might also brighten her day.

If she is having difficulty with change or often asks the same question many times, use familiarity to your benefit. Take her to a family member’s home or her favorite restaurant for lunch.

If your mother or grandmother has limited visual awareness or has lost her fine motor skills but is still mobile, use her large motor skills to your advantage. Go for a walk, pick out fresh fruit at a farmer’s market or, if she loves animals, watch dogs play at a dog park.

Baltimore is home to some great daytime attractions for seniors. Depending on your loved one’s level of fitness, consider an outing on the Torrey C. Brown Trail (formerly the NCR Trail), which begins at Ashland Road in Hunt Valley. A trip to the Baltimore Farmers’ Market and Bazaar under the Jones Falls Expressway is also a rich sensory experience. Try to go early in the morning before it gets too crowded, and keep in mind this is more appropriate for mentally healthy seniors, as those with dementia-related issues may become agitated in loud or busy settings.

And, if she is only aware of the world around her for a short period of time, be sure to talk to her, not about her as if she isn’t there. Spend time reading to her or talking about happy memories. She may not understand all of what you are saying, but your voice will be soothing.

No matter how you choose to celebrate, the most important thing this Mother’s Day is to spend time with your loved one, enjoying each other’s company.

About the author:

Lisa Vogel is founder and CEO of The Lisa Vogel Agency, an award-winning in-home care agency that provides custodial care on a live-in or hourly basis for clients requiring long- or short-term rehabilitation or hospice care. Lisa considers her agency a personalized matchmaking service — finding the right trusted caregiver for each of her clients.

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