A Doggie Menu
For Farfel, Please!
Michigan, the Mitten State, is known for beautiful, pristine
beaches, numerous verdant golf courses, abundant cherry crops, ski resorts,
expansive sand dunes, and of course
Mackinac Island to name just a few of
the delights that hearken millions of people every year.
Now maybe we can add something else to this impressive list
— dog-friendly restaurants!
Find out what's happening in Oakland Township-Lake Orionfor free with the latest updates from Patch.
Yes, you read that correctly.
Kalamazoo County Republican Margaret O’Brien has just sponsored
House Bill 4335 (2013) which will allow restaurant owners with outside dining
facilities to welcome dogs with their owners.
Find out what's happening in Oakland Township-Lake Orionfor free with the latest updates from Patch.
For canine lovers it is inexcusable to leave Rasputin at
home while its owner enjoys an epicurean delight at a favorite Michigan dining
facility.
Better to leave Grandma at home with the TV remote and a bag
of Cheetos than to abandon man's best friend!
Consider, if you will, a typical evening in your favorite
restaurant under the new law. You are seated next to Kujo and his master. While
you peruse the menu, Kujo is voraciously lapping up a bowl of Evian water,
pausing only momentarily to eye longingly a female French poodle that is
enjoying a liver pate at a nearby table.
As your platter of chicken arrives, Kujo now looks menacingly
at legs and thighs — not what's on your platter, but your legs and thighs!
Evidently he is not a vegetarian, is hungry and only the
watchful eye of his owner prevents you from becoming his appetizer!
Minutes later, as you attempt to make your way to the
restroom, you feel like a soldier trying to avoid land mines, but these
"special surprises" were painstakingly left by Kujo and his friends.
Perhaps O’Brien is trying to appease a bloc of voters who
love their animals as much as she loves their votes.
Let's not stop at dogs, though.
Shouldn't pony lovers be accommodated?
One of my friends raises emus and I'm sure that would be an
interesting dining experience to see these two-legged, long-necked birds
wrestle food off adjoining tables.
Well, time to go. A friend of mine just called with an
emergency. Seems he was dining with
Rover at a local Chinese restaurant. Unexpectedly, Rover had to answer a
scatological calling in the restroom but first had to meander through the
kitchen and unfortunately hasn't been heard from since.
Waiter, hold off on my beef kabobs!
Bill Kalmar
