Put A Cork In It!

Put A Cork In It!

If ever you thought that the Michigan Legislature is spinning their wheels in Lansing and focusing on legislation that has little, if any, impact on the vast majority of Michiganders, look no further than House Bill #5046.  The Bill recently signed by Governor Snyder allows restaurants and bars to allow their customers to bring in their own bottles of wine.  These aristocratic upper class bores can bring in their favorite wine as long as it is not featured in the restaurant or bar – hotels and resorts are exempt from the new legislation.  Restaurants are able to charge upwards of $25 for what is called a “corking fee”.  Frankly, it appears as if the wine that is offered in Michigan establishments is primarily for us the unwashed commoners.  Thus a segment of our society wants to dazzle their friends and of course the restaurant wait staff with their own revered, prized wine.  Can you say, “Pass me the decanter for I am a wine snob!”

This exercise in snobbery and shallowness reminds me of a “Seinfeld” episode wherein Jerry brings his own brand of maple syrup into Monk’s restaurant for his pancakes.  Unfortunately for Jerry, the owner did not have a similar Michigan “uncorking Bill” and thus the syrup was confiscated. 

Now that House Bill #5046 has been passed I wonder if our astute group of Lansing legislators is exploring the possibility of us soda imbibers bringing in our favorite soft drink.  Pepsi is my favorite soda of choice; however, there are restaurants that carry only Coke products.  In those instances, shouldn’t I be able to bring in my own product of choice?  I sure think so!

There is another aspect to all this falderal.  Perhaps some of the patrons don’t want to pay the exorbitant wine price offered by some restaurants so they bring in a discounted bottle of vino, maybe their favorite bottle of “Two Buck Chuck”.  One can only imagine the reaction of the wait staff quickly realizing that their tip has just been decreased by the boldness of the customer.  On the other hand, the patron may want to watch out for that “special sauce” that could appear on their meal!  Guess in Michigan we will have to get used to BYOB being Bring Your Own Booze!  Michigan Legislature – can you say “Part time!”.

Bill Kalmar