Neighbors: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

Lately, I have noticed people posting things online about their neighbors.  Some of it is good, some of it bad, and some if it… well, let’s just say it should not be repeated.  Let’s face it, love them or hate them – our neighbors are here to stay.  When you move into a new neighborhood, or when new people move into yours, you never really know what you are going to get (Mamma always said life was like a box of chocolates, right?).  The personalities of our neighbors can range from sweet and friendly to just plain nasty.  The key to living in peace, is to learn how to deal with different personality types.  Being a real estate agent, I have had to master this skill, so let me share some of my secrets with you.

The Wacky Neighbor

These are the folks who barge into your living room and convince you to invest in their new ferret farm (got to love Kramer), and talk to you about their personal (really personal) problems, when you barely even know them.  They are the ones who usually have a flock of pink flamingos and a village of gnomes all over their front yard, and let’s not forget the panic room in their basement because they just know the end of the world is coming.

How to Deal:  Keep these people at arm’s length.  If the wacky ones think you are their best friend, they will never leave you alone.  And you’ll be forced to deal with their zaniness until it drives you utterly crazy.  Just wave, smile, say hello, and keep moving.  Long conversations with these people can go places you’ll wish you had never gone.  Be friendly, keep your distance, and be sure to make notes - their antics make for good stories!

The Difficult Neighbor

These are the people who make your life more complicated than it needs to be.  They want to have a ‘few words’ with you about your kids walking too close to their perfectly manicured grass; about knowing it must be your dog that is pooping on their lawn; about any noise after 7:00 p.m.; and definitely about your guests who park on the street in front of their house.

How to Deal:  Maintain a good rapport with people having this type of personality.  While being friendly with these very unfriendly people may seem hard to do – give it a try.  Kill them with kindness, as the saying goes.  Wave hello every time you see them – even if earlier that day, they scolded you for letting your kids draw on the sidewalk with chalk.  Ask them if they are enjoying the weather and to let you or your spouse know if they need a hand with anything around the house.  But when they come to you with their irrational complaints and ridiculous demands – be firm.  Stand your ground and give your side of the story.  Let them know that you are not to be bossed around, and try to end the conversation with a handshake and a smile!

The Overly Friendly Neighbor

This is the person who wants to be your best friend as soon as you move into the neighborhood – or as soon as they move into yours!  They show up at your front door with a plate of cookies and a million questions about who you are, what you do, and where you are from.  They will also probably give you the scoop about everyone else in the neighborhood.  This person might mosey on over to your house a couple of times a day just to chat, ask you to go to Yoga class, see if you want to buy some Girl Scout cookies… and find out what you think about the neighbor two doors down!  Screeeech!  Pull over and stop the car – we are not even going there!

How to Deal:  As always, be your usual, friendly self - but do not be as friendly as they are!  Make it seem as though you are busier than you actually are, politely turning down their twenty different offers for lunch dates and yoga classes.  Of course, accept one or two now and then because, after all, you are not a mean person. You want to make new friends, but you definitely don’t want to be buddy-buddy with the town gossip queen – that’s never a good look!  Remember to stay on their good side though, because you don’t want to end up as fodder for the town gossip!

So that was my quick guide to dealing with a few different personality types when it comes to neighbors. As I mentioned earlier, being a real estate agent has allowed me to meet many, many different types of people and I have learned how to handle them all. So whether these (interesting) people are your neighbors, clients, co-workers, bosses, or relatives - it's good to know how to deal. And feel free to leave a comment talking about some personality types that I didn't mention - because I could go on forever talking about them all! Thanks for reading!