Peace...Now

I almost got into an accident yesterday. A driver went through a red light, I swerved, mounted the curb, missed the pole…and the fire hydrant. I came back down on the road without contacting anything or anyone. I wasn’t speeding. I was driving westbound on Broadway and came to Monroe, the car darted north, against the red right in front of me. I was too close to stop so I swerved.

I saw in the rear view mirror the car continue through the intersection with another right behind. I was at first shaken but then strangely calm.

People often blow red lights at our Broadway intersections despite the signs: "Wait for Green Light".

When I got home, Cheryl was on the phone in the art studio with one of her sisters, she was laughing as usual. I don’t laugh much these days. I was glad to hear her laughter.

I said, “I’m going to walk on the boardwalk.” It was a mild winter day but blowy walk. I walked too far for comfort, but it still felt good.

When I got back Cheyrl was now in our apartment talking and laughing with another sister. Music.

I went into to the bedroom to watch a movie on TV or something, anything. But I had the channel set to Soundscapes, as a default. I like the music but also the wise words that go with it.

But then one photo that played with the music showed a park that looked much like Belmont park where Mary Lynn, my recently deceased daughter, ran one winter day with her sister, Kathleen. I posted it recently.

Mary Lynn is not here for Christmas. She’s not in pain either. But I was. Time will heal, that’s all that will heal.

One of Deepak Chopra’s quotes appeared on the TV, paraphrasing, “When you go beyond your thoughts to your Self, that is real meditation”. It caught my attention. It is so similar to other quotes. The place beyond thought is a place of peace. Elkhart Tolle had instilled that in me over the years

So I did have one last thought, as Tolle suggested, I thought, “What, at this moment, right now…do you lack?” I then felt the mattress below me, soft, welcoming, the music filled my ears, Cheryl’s laughter from the living room. At this moment, Now, I lacked nothing. I was at peace, as long as I stayed in the Now.

The music, the inspirational words, the repeated laughter, was my wonderful presence. There is a sadness to this Christmas. But there are things to be thankful for too.

I did not crash, there was no-one on the curb for me to strike and perhaps kill. All was good.

May you be as at peace as I am when I realize...Now. I sincerely wish you all a present Christmas with those you love,

Leebythesea