Getting lost in gifts...

By Carol Dores

We all get to choose how we and our families spend the holidays. What is the focus? What are our rituals? What do we do together?

When the boys were younger, we would light the menorah together every night. We would have potato latkes a few nights, and I fondly remember them never making it to the table, just like when I was growing up. We quickly learned that giving a present a night resulted in disappointment some nights. So we decided to give presents all at once, so the focus was on the holiday, rather than the gifts. We would play the dreidel game together with pennies. We had eight nights of family fun.

What are some things you can do to build memories over the holidays and vacation, instead of having the focus on the material things? Regardless of what holiday is celebrated in your home, here are some ideas:

· Spend time together planning the holiday menu and cooking together.

· Have each person make one gift for each other. It can be a gift coupon, like for doing someone else’s chore for a period of time. It can be a handmade item, like a drawing. Encourage creativity!

· At the beginning of the holiday dinner, each share at least one thing you are grateful for.

· Agree to all play a game together.

· Plan a vacation outdoor activity to all do together.

· Take turns picking movies to watch as a family.

· Agree on how much time each day during vacation can be spent using a gift or screen time. You can also carry this one beyond vacation!

· Play a board game or charades.

· Take turns making breakfast.

· Plan a day to stay in pajamas all day, playing around the house.

Building family memories creates lifelong bonds. When times are tough, we can all then count on the strong relationships we’ve built over the years.

Happy holidays, from our family to yours!

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