Recollections of My Friend: Grace Roma

If I have anyone to thank or blame for my almost obsessive interest in local government, I would have to cite Grace Roma, who was a Yorktown businesswoman, entrepreneur, social and political activist, and patroness of many charities and good causes. 

Grace died suddenly in 2006 from a stroke and, as might be expected, she was in the middle of  planning a vacation to her beloved Bermuda. Grace loved to travel and did it frequently, usually with her three children or friends. 

My thoughts returned to her last month when her name was in the news in connection with the sale by her children of the , her commercial property in town.

Like most people, my early interest in politics and town government centered on issues that affected me personally, and I attended town board meetings only when such issues were to be discussed. I noticed there was always an attractive older woman sitting in the front row of the meeting room. She was quite thin with short blond hair, dressed impeccably, and listening to every word being spoken.

The supervisor at the time and board members would sometimes ask her questions, referring to her with a tone of deference as “Grace,” but I didn’t make the connection between her and Yorktown’s first large commercial building until someone referred to her as Mrs. Roma. I had read that her husband had died in 1976 and she had become the patroness for many young businesses in town by giving them a break on rent in her building until they were on their feet.

At many town board meetings, Grace got up during “Courtesy of the Floor” to comment on a topic the board was discussing, and it was always interesting. Frequently she would come to the speaker’s podium with information gleaned from the town code that flew in the face of what the board members were trying to do.

She was unapologetic when she had to be firm and prove her point. For instance, if yet another stop light was proposed on a street where she didn’t think it was really needed, she would research police report records to see how many accidents had happened on that corner to support her argument that yet another light was unnecessary. 

When I had the opportunity to say hello to her for the first time, commenting on one of her statements before the board, I asked if she came to all the board meetings.  “Oh, yes,” she said. “You should come to them all too. It’s better entertainment than you’ll find any place else!”

Grace was an advocate for everything that was good and decent about the town, and she was friends with all Yorktown staff, board members and volunteers. She once told me that she always said “yes” to every candidate who asked for her vote because she'd say, “Once I’m in the voting booth, nobody knows what I do!”

When the A&P tried to take over the space of another grocery store that had gone out of business, Grace brought a lawsuit against the company saying that this would create a monopoly among grocery store companies in town and would eliminate competitive pricing. She had the town join the suit and A&P backed down.

Sometimes Grace was on the fence about certain issues for a while, but would ultimately make a stand. For instance, Guiding Eyes for the Blind at one time had open kennels for its dogs and neighbors complained that the barking created a disturbance. A coalition was formed to encourage the organization to sound proof its socialization space, but efforts were at first unsuccessful.

The barking never bothered Grace so she remained neutral, even though she lived right across the street from the school. But when she saw that many of her neighbors were being adversely affected, she joined the rally to have GED take action for noise abatement, and eventually it did.

She was a member of several social and charitable organizations, like the Rotary Club where she was presented a Paul Harris Fellow Award, the highest honor a member can receive. Also she had served as president of the Yorktown Chamber of Commerce as her husband had done before her.

Town clerk Alice Roker said there was a time when she was researching a past project the town had done with an outside agency, but could find no records of it. However, she called Grace who told her she had copies of the records stored in boxes in her home.

And there was another time when the call went out for the need of bullet-proof vests for all police offers, and Grace responded by donating all of them to the department. Another donation that is more visible than a bullet-proof vest is the statue of Christopher Columbus in Downing Park that she and her husband contributed to the town some years ago. It was sculpted in Italy, the country where her husband Joe was born and where he and Grace loved to visit frequently. After Joe’s death, Grace continued to travel to many other locations.

My friend Geri Schwalb, a previous town clerk and currently a realtor, said she once asked Grace why, despite many men friends in her social circle, she had chosen never to marry again. She replied with a devilish smile, “I will get married again once I find a guy who has more money than I do!” 

And once when I visited her home, she commented on the fact that many in town thought that she lived rather simply, considering her income. “My children suggested that I had enough money to move to Bedford or Chappaqua, but I said why?  Yorktown is my hometown and you want me to leave it?”

Grace drove the biggest Continental I had ever seen and she loved that car, which she called "that boat." My wife and I once escorted her to a charity event in White Plains, but she insisted on driving us in her car. When we arrived at her home, she came out decked in a handsome fur and more than a few diamonds.

She went into the silent auction room with buying on her mind and, indeed, she bid on many baseball memorabilia for her grandchildren. During the course of the dinner, she kept asking me to check her placement on the bidding sheets and to go up to the next level if someone had outbid her. By the end of the evening, she had outbid everybody else on all the pieces she wanted and contributed the greatest amount to the cause.  

She was a good neighbor too, always offering advice where she could. We talked about many things, and one day we got to the subject of my business. I was being given the opportunity to expand my marketing business by taking on a new, very large project that involved a major investment for me at the time. I told her I was nervous about it and didn’t know whether I could meet the challenge to succeed in it and get a good return on my investment.

She looked me square in the eye and said, “Is it something that you’d love doing?” When I responded yes, she said, “Then do it and do it well. Don’t worry, the money will follow.” 

Good advice from a lady who had money following her, because she did so many things so well.