Virtual Gobbity Gook

Virtual Gobbity Gook

A while back my 15 year old son, Holden, pleaded with me to take him to the Micro –something center to exchange what I recall him describing was a graphics card for his computer. His teenage brain is currently in “virtual gobbity gook”, as I call it, because except for consuming anything that is not nailed down in the kitchen he is consumed with technological toys that not only cost a fortune but are so far beyond the “Etch-a-Sketch” TM I grew up on in the 70’s. And, yes, I will admit, I am without a clue.

He used to have a small sports passion. He played baseball, soccer, hockey, football and was pretty darn good at whatever sport he pursued. But since high school started, it has been squeezed out by gigs, graphics and definitely not girls. ( At least not real ones anyway.) Possibly the on-line, scantily clothed, animated power vixens are the only ones he acknowledges. Believe me, I am sort of happy he is not engrossed in the young ladies just yet, but there doesn’t even seem to be an inkling of interest as he continues to build his masterminded den of hi-tech, technological, techy-tech stuff that I don’t even begin to understand. At one point in my life, when the internet just started, back in the 90’s, I thought I was savvy. Somewhere along the lines, computer know-how has passed by me at warp speed and I currently know how my parents felt when the Disk Camera came out to replace the flash cube polaroid we used to have….helpless.

So as we arrive at the Micro-something center, my son gets out of the car walking, rather running, 20 feet ahead me. He struts in and right up to the service center with a very commanding aura into his “candy store” of processors and cables and directs his conversation to the “geek”, I mean gentleman, behind the counter using tech talk to convey his desire to return and exchange his previous purchase. While he nattered systems convo (that’s short for conversation) to the sales rep, I only heard “ do you have a whatchamacallit for a huzeywhich…?” As far as I know they were speaking Klingon. With my mouth dropped open, and my perplexed facial expression materializing in slow motion, my son looked over grinning and said, “Hey Mom, do you have any idea what we are talking about?” Guess that answer was obvious. However, my son knew exactly what he needed, and then some, and certainly able to speak on par with the 40-something year old computer dude behind the counter. I realized at that very moment, I was old…er and the comprehension gap was only going to get wid..er.

We eventually left the store with Holden satisfied with his upgrade, and me not-so-much with my downgrade in finances. (To be honest, he did spend most of his own money he saved from working this summer). Actually we were in and out within 14 minutes flat. Especially since Holden did his homework, knew exactly what he wanted and knew how to talk the tech talk and walk the tech walk. I must admit, despite my longing for me to be sitting on the sidelines cheering him on in a baseball or soccer game, I am awed by his cybernetic intellect. And now that there is an small interest in girls, and the heartbreaks are yet to come, I am sure we will all remember an former time when being into computers was much easier than being into girls.

My guess is that when Holden’s kids are 15 years old, the gap will remain constant…his kids will always have the upper hand on what is new in technology and he may someday just be scratching his head the same way I am right now and wondering what the heck his kids are saying too.