Restringing A Necklace And Half Empty Half Full

When Ethan, age three years and one and half months, went to preschool, he is now 11 years old and when in first grade- pre which used to be called nursery school when his father went there and he had been there for the third time that week, and on the first day he had a tear or two when Mommy left. The teacher told my daughter-in-law to go in the hallway and they would see what would happen. She did and she saw he was fine and she left and when she picked him up three hours later, he was happy to see her and had a good time. The next day, his daddy dropped him off and Ethan saw a classmate with tears and his nose was running. So darling sweet Ethan got a Kleenex and wiped the running nose to comfort his friend. The teacher told my son that was the sweetest thing she had ever seen in a young child of that age. She has been teaching preschoolers for over twenty years.

Ethan shows already at his young age the compassion and kindness that I taught my children and that his parents are teaching him. Of course, all grandparents think their grandchildren are smart, articulate, beautiful and kind. I know for a fact that my three grandsons are all of that and more and Ethan, who is the youngest grandson, exhibited it yesterday. Ava, his sister, will be doing the same when her time comes for school and social contacts.

Grandparenting is different than parenting because we are so much older and we can stand aside and absorb the wonderful light that shines upon us because of who we are now in this later senior life and be proud of the excellent mission we have accomplished. Grandparenting almost in a way can be analogous to ballroom dancing. How in the world can that be? Here is how. Having a new grandchild or first grandchild is new, exciting, fresh and bewildering. So can starting to dance at a later age, as is grandparenting. It is exciting, fresh and quite full of bewilderment. We look at it as a challenge and we realize that as we progress (as the baby gets older) we have this wonderful thing in our hands and we can be ecstatic in learning all about it.

We are proud and one day when we watch the baby without his parents there, we are cognizant of what has just happened. We did it and we had fun and so it is with dancing. We did it, we had fun, and we are proud of our self. So having a grandchild is certainly more important than ballroom dancing, but the two of them are delightful moments, hours, and days in our life. Life is full of learning experiences, some great, others not so special.

We can take good moments and secure those in our minds to ease the bad times when they happen. It will simply outweigh the difficult times and our tears will be tears of joy, not tears of sadness. We have grown from this experience, whether sad or happy. We have flourished, strived, and matured.

We can wipe a tear from a fellow dancer (so to speak) by trying to establish in their minds that they can learn to dance at any age whether advanced or young. Some people, when starting out, feel that it is too late to learn ballroom dancing. A reader of my columns by the name of Steven Behr living in Washington State wrote me of the spreading of dancing he and his partner do. He is a member of the Steilacoom Dance Company, a group of seniors directed by Mary Peterson who is the teacher and choreographer. The dance company goes to hospitals and nursing/retirement homes to celebrate their dancing modes. They perform tap, ballroom, and Polynesian dances at these establishments.

25 years, Mary and Steven have been going to Hawaii, sharing the love of dance they have at hospitals, nursing homes and senior and community centers. The couple goes there at their own expense; the others in the group do not due to the cost of traveling. I have written about them in a former article a few weeks ago. When Steven and Mary went on their last trip to Hawaii, he asked a petite lady named Matsuko, who had been sitting for the entire session, to dance with him. She told him she had not danced for 50 years. He got her to dance by coaxing her a bit, and he moved around with her in place. He said she had good balance, and they started with a basic Foxtrot step. Very soon thereafter she told him she was 104 years old. The people stopped dancing and started to clap. Steven thought they were clapping for him but it was for Matsuko. Of course, Steven is modest; they were applauding both of them. She became the queen of the ball. He asked her about her longevity and she said it was "attitude." I guess her attitude was one of good health, good feelings, and being blessed with excellent genes.

Mary and Steven believe that "the glass is half full and that each day brings many opportunities for growth, sharing and fun." They feel that they are role models wherever they go to spread their love of dancing. In Hawaii, they are considered ohna which means family; the Hawaiians share the aloha spirit with them. Steven and Mary are both semi-retired seniors. Mary has passed away several years ago.

Half full and half empty is a lovely expression that we all use. There was a famous pianist that lived in Baltimore, Maryland where I am from, who lost the use of his right hand in playing the piano due to an illness. He in turn learned to play with his other hand and gave concerts doing so. Many years later through therapy and operations, he was able to use both hands in the normal manner. He always said that his glass was still half full when he lost the use of that hand. His name is Leon Fleisher.

The pianist and the 104 year young lady, they needed no tear to be wiped from their eyes. Their eyes were and are wide open and they can see the depth of the ethereal time on this earth we all have. Our journey here is exquisite and we all can make the most of what we are given and even if some of it is taken away, we can still be drinking the full glass of crystal-clear times and we can help those who may not be fortunate as we are to accomplish new things and special moments. That is why I write these columns to inspire people to go dance and to be full of light in their senior and not yet senior lives. People are living longer and healthier lives now and we all must take the time to mind the word aloha which means hello and goodbye as does the Hebrew word shalom which also means the same thing.

They said that this is like stringing a necklace and the strands are around our heart.