Those Pathways Through Paradise

The Greendale Patch – America’s Number 1 Online Local News Site - according a somewhat biased ITB survey - has been running a great series entitled “Gas Tank Getaways.” 

(Listen, you are a good sentence into this column.  Take a break and enter “gas tank” in that search box in the upper right corner.  I’ll wait – while you are rewarded with a bevy – yes a bevy – of great road trips.)

My talented colleague, Cheryl Sanders, put a getaway together for Destination Greendale: 

For us folks residing in the Bubble, we are fortunate that our ‘getaway’ to Greendale will not require even a gallon of that liquid gold.  We can walk it. 

All of which leads me to a column idea by Mark Zalewski.  (Stay with me - this will, potentially, all come together.)

Mark, who, by the way, can be heard mornings on 620 WTMJ with his “News About Your Money” reports at 6:55 and 7:55 a.m., resides – as I do - in the G Section.  The G Section is west of 76th Street.

Greendale-ites living east of 76^th Street refer to the G Section as “New Berlin” or “Minnesota.”  Mark and I also have another thing in common, something that makes people stop, point and shake their heads in apparent disgust: We did not grow up in Greendale. 

This explains Mark’s column idea, sent over in an email response to a recent ITB column.  Mr. Zalewski opened with this line – “Hey – great piece again – as always” which kept me 1) reading his email and 2) not adding “Mark” to my spam filter.  Then Mark showed his non-native Greendale status by adding:

“Something that has always intrigued me about Greendale – the village is laced with paved paths that meander behind houses and through the woods (like the one wandering off from school)   What’s up with that?  Where do they go and what’s at the end?    Is there a story there?”

Is there a story there?  I have recently interviewed a goose and a buck.  Yes, indeed there is a story in those Sidewalks of Mystery.  It is just up to you to pick out the real one:

Footpaths in Paradise Story One:  Village President John Hermes – plump with Stimulus Dollars - got a smoking deal on surplus chain saws and mini asphalt pavers.  You can see where the creation of paved footpaths was simply the natural next step.

Footpaths in Paradise Story Two:  Al Capone – when not in Chicago or Northwoods Wisconsin – ran a small bootleg cheese curd operation in what is now Greendale, WI. The Feds often had our Alphabet Streets thoroughly covered, leading to Capone’s men creating non- street sidewalks for an easy, undercover getaway.  According to legend, you can take those footpaths all the way to Wrigley Field.

Footpaths in Paradise Story Three:  Greendale, easily the best of the three Greenbelt Planned Communities built in the late 1930’s, was really stuck on that whole English Garden thing.  Green space, parks, gardens and schools were all meant to be safely accessible to all residents.  I have been told by reliable sources (mostly 14 year olds) that you can have leafy, beautifully safe walk to any of our schools and parks – just as long as you do not live west of 76^th Street.  (Sprinting – in full scream - across 76^th is why us Westsiders do so well in track.) 

Whether you walking, biking, or just making out, these pathways are perfect.

As Mark pointed out, the footpaths around Canterbury’s clearly enchanted forests - are noteworthy.  For the buckthorn lover, the most hidden footpath is at the end of Gladstone that dumps you into the thicket that encompasses the Root River.  Try to find it on Google Earth, if you're a little hard up for fun things to do.  But the very best of Greendale’s footpaths is downtown – the footbridge that connects Broad Street to Daffodil Park.  There is no better place to enjoy a Turtle Sundae.

It is here - savoring that caramel, hot fudge, pecans and custard - you understand why you just love Greendale so much. Better bring an extra napkin.